Best Place To Kill Two Birds

Blackstone Liquors

The grueling workweek is done, and you have that measly little crumpled paycheck in your back pocket. That small piece of paper represents your toil, your sweat, your blood. And it's barely enough to keep a leaking roof over your head. So what do you do? You take it to Blackstone's, where you not only cash the check (minus a mere 2.5 percent or so), but you get a bottle of their cheapest whiskey to help you forget all about the horrible pay, the terrible job, your bad credit, and the fact that you're all alone in this world. It goes for $8.99 a liter, and it has all the charm and taste of a rag-wrapped old can of turpentine from your father's garage. That's not important. It gets the job done, and you still have a few dimes left to buy a can of Van Camp's pork and beans for dinner from Blackstone's food section. You're set for the weekend. It's a wonderful life.

 
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