Best Place to Prepare for Revolution

It's not the bombs over Baghdad. It's the whole damn world gone crazy. We used to dismiss that little voice; "Firearms," it would whisper. "They'll make you feel safe." Back then, it was serial killers. Anger over not being able to wander freely without fear of rape. Now it's the government that has us thinking about weapons of less-than-mass destruction. Maybe the survivalists had it right all along. That's a crazy thought, no? And the voice keeps getting more insistent as the vise tightens on our civil rights. Feeling flattened yet? Hear the creak as the handle's turned? Not that we urge you to bear arms against the government. It's just our right to be prepared. At Big Al's, you can get a private lesson for $30 per half hour. Just one will enable you to shoot in the general direction of where you're aiming. After that, it's only $4.50 a person, unlimited time, $10 for gun rental, and $10 for 50 rounds. Proficiency is a long way off. In the meantime, maybe you better dust off the ol' critical intelligence. It's a weapon of unlimited potential. And your country needs you. Heck, you need you.