Limited Time Warranty

Heaven isn't too far away, and neither is their Behind the Music

SAT 8/16

The music industry is a cold and unforgiving mistress. However, over the past few years, there has been a resurgence in tours of the glam-metal persuasion that dominated airwaves in the '80s, and why not? Last year, Vince Neil came through and showed this town nothing but a good time. A few weeks ago, Skid Row and Poison gave South Florida a dose of high-kickin', guitar-solo-obsessed rock, even if their high kicks weren't as high as they used to be. This year, the act popping out of the Where Are They Now? bandwagon with tighter-than-legally allowed pants is Warrant.

If the group has seemed absent for the last few years, it is because, well, no one really missed it. The band may have been able to live off the royalties from "Cherry Pie" and "Uncle Tom's Cabin," but it's 13 years later, and dammit, '80s hair rock isn't dead. It's just having a harder time fitting... ugh... into those... aargh... leather pants again. Whew. Yeah, let's skip the vests with no shirts this time, guys.

Too… much… pleather
Too… much… pleather
Daphne and Debbie work the corner of Avenue D.
Conrad Ventur
Daphne and Debbie work the corner of Avenue D.
Ringo finally gets the spotlight
Ringo finally gets the spotlight
The Heatseekers want you to move, dammit!
The Heatseekers want you to move, dammit!

But the boys in Warrant can't help it; they still wanna rock! The Down Boys are not touring on their laurels either: They have a new album out called Under the Influence, including covers of Cheap Trick, Thin Lizzy, David Bowie, and AC/DC. Guitarist Erik Turner summed it up in a recent interview: "I'm really surprised by how many younger fans are out there at our shows. Some of them could be our kids. Maybe they are! We see and meet a lot of high school kids who are coming to our shows and checking us out for the first time." Rebel against your parents and go see Warrant, with a little less hairspray, on the Beer, Babes and Bands Tour, featuring Whitesnake, Kip Winger, and Slaughter. Show starts at 3 p.m. at Sound Advice Amphitheatre, 601-7 Sansbury's Way, West Palm Beach. Tickets cost $25 to $35. Call 561-793-0445. -- Tim Moffatt

MON 8/18Slut Rock

Taking Dirty South to its Logical Extreme

Avenue D's hit song "Do I Look Like a Slut?" asks a question that can be answered very simply: Yes, you, Debbie D., and you, Daphne D., look like two coifed hipster sluts. And it's good. Clad in garish sexuality and little else, the two rap about their slut status with ironic naiveté: "You know, maybe it's these outfits we wear/I mean, I can see your boobies." "Shit, my stylist is on a budget/He's just trying to save some fabric/It really doesn't matter/I'm just going to end up taking it off anyways." The duo from Miami made its mark in New York City's emerging electro clash scene in 2001, when they were still teenagers. They perform at LUXX in Brooklyn and Webster Hall, delivering nasty rhymes over a background of old-school bass beats. It's like 2 Live Crew meets Tigra circa 1989: girls moaning "oh me so horny" in the back seats of "cars that go boom." The straightforward sex is a pure shot of the freak-nasty, booty-grinding South Florida ethos. Avenue D performs at Soho Lounge (175 NE 36th St., Miami) on August 18. Call 305-576-1988. -- Courtney HambrightSUN 8/17The One and Only Billy Shears!

Ringo gets by with a little help from his friends

Does even his family call him Richard Starkey anymore? Likely not. Ringo Starr has gone under that name for so long and in a band so famous that his given name has lost nearly all relevance -- possibly even for him. As one of the lesser Beatles, though (let's face it -- John and Paul will forever take up the limelight), Ringo has had to work extra hard to get out from under the Beatle thumb. Since the late 1980s, he's accomplished that by touring with his All-Starr Band. This Sunday at 8 p.m., the tour comes to Mizner Park Amphitheatre (Federal Highway at NE Mizner Park Boulevard, Boca Raton) to promote Ringo's 2003 release, Ringorama. That album, his second since the 1992 comeback album Time Takes Time, relies on both Ringo's usual band and a host of guest appearances, including Eric Clapton, David Gilmour, and Willie Nelson. Whether he can pull off the new stuff without the collaborators remains to be seen. Tickets cost $35, $45, $55, or $65. Call 561-447-8144. -- Dan SweeneyFRI 8/15Dance Party WPB

You know when you're standing around between sets at a show, trying to look bored seated at the bar, or searching for a familiar face to talk to? And the DJ is playing that White Stripes song that you liked before radio started playing it 12 times a day? Isn't there a place to go on Fridays in West Palm where you don't have to straddle the barbed-wire fence of black vinyl or tube tops? Hey, Mr. Rhetorical Question, you're in luck! Respectable Street (518 Clematis St., West Palm Beach) is holding down the old-school dance party with sets by Real Cool Time DJs Ben and Ryan, who kick out the best in '60s soul, funk, and R&B. Those rowdy kids in the Heatseekers, the merry pranksters of Billy Boloby, and Baby Dracula also perform. There will be a dance-off and maybe even a spontaneous choreographed dance sequence, so make sure you're wearing sensible shoes. Show starts at 9 p.m. Call 561-832-9999. -- Audra Schroeder

 
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