THU 8/14Are you tired of all those potty-mouth comics dragging their filth and verbal depravity across this great state of ours? As we all know, South Florida doesn't take kindly to that tone. We're upstanding citizens, you know. Well, thank goodness for Carlos Oscar. He's been described as a "clean" comic, and his act consists of jokes about common problems: family, relationships, pets. Just everyday stuff! Oscar cites the late Freddie Prinze as a "clean" influence (a "cleanfluence"?), and he's bringing his act to the New York Comedy Club (8221 Glades Rd., Boca Raton). Listen closely for the squeaking -- it's just that clean. Oscar performs Thursday through Saturday. Call 561-470-6887 for times.
FRI 8/15Yes, kids, it's that time again. "The 8th Annual South Florida Tattoo Expo" happens this weekend. The skeleton in a pimp costume in the ad promises this year to be better than last, as does the scary clown with the cold dead eyes on the website. Just a side thought: What is it with tattoo artists and scary clowns? Is there some sort of unspoken alliance here? Anywho, the expo hosts a variety of vendors and tattoo and piercing artists, a suspension show (that's metal hooks in the back, kids), and a live fetish show (which probably also entails metal hooks in some form, in some orifice). This barrel o' laughs rolls into the Coral Springs Marriott (11775 Heron Bay Blvd., Coral Springs) on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. Call 954-753-5598 or 877-892-TATS.
SAT 8/16Can't get enough of dance music? Love watching DJs push buttons on their iBooks? Well, West Palm Beach's own Senseiis coming back to his old stomping grounds for his first performance in more than a year. Call it progressive, call it intelligent, call it electro, just don't expect it to call you back. Sensei has been touring for his debut release, I'm the Only One, and has played with Freq Nasty and Hybrid. Check out his jams, along with fellow DJ BFX, when they play OHM (124 N. Dixie Hwy., West Palm Beach) as part of the Shinobi Shakedown Tour and turn the mother out. Call 561-333-8913, or visit www.rebekahsdreams.com.
SUN 8/17A trip to DaDa (52 N. Swinton Ave., Delray Beach) at 10 p.m. today might be a necessity for anyone with a modicum of hipness. For starters, DaDa itself is perhaps the mecca of Delray cool. But singling this night out among all the others is a performance by Out of the Anonymous. Our shiny, happy, sister paper, Miami New Times, found out about the Out of the Anonymous buzz when the band popped up as the Best Electronica Artist in the paper's Best Of reader's poll. That's no small accomplishment in a city drenched in electronica acts -- admittedly, few of them worth much ink. Out of the Anonymous separates itself from the pack with its unusual mish-mash of members. While Henry Rajan bangs out the bass, Kevin Sanchez plays guitar, and Neil Rippe provides percussion on tables and found objects, Ulysses Perez lays down the synth, and DJ Snowhite hits the turntables. Thick is perhaps the best word to describe the resulting sound. Admission to tonight's show is free. Call 561-330-3232.
MON 8/18So you want a place to hang out after work, but you don't like the whole singles scene? Well, there's finally a place for young hip professionals to meet and enjoy art that doesn't have the word singles or dating or speed or three-minute in it. The Bass Museum (250 NE 60th St., Miami) offers ArtCrowd, an after-work event where visitors can enjoy cocktails and food and where they can meet with local artists. This outing, titled "Off the Beaten Path," features the art of sculptor Federico Uribe and Carolina Sardi, and visitors can tour their studios to get insight into their art. After the meet and greet, the crowd can enjoy dinner at One Ninety in the Design District. The festivities begin at 6:30 p.m. Admission is $29 for ArtCrowd members, $39 for nonmembers. For just the studio visit, admission is free for members, $10 for nonmembers. Call 305-673-7530, ext. 1013, or visit www.bassmuseum.org.
TUE 8/19Intracoastal cruises can be a fun way to waste a few hours oohing and aahing over waterfront mansions and noting the existence of interesting bars, clubs, restaurants, and other places you may want to hit after you once again find yourself on dry land. But who wants to go through all the bother of actually walking from land and boarding a boat? The North Palm Beach Recreation Department cuts out this onerous step with cruises aboard the Diva Duck. The amphibious vessel departs the North Palm Beach Recreation Center (1200 Prosperity Farms Rd., North Palm Beach) at 10:30 a.m. and drives to the Intracoastal, where it slips into the water to continue the cruise. Admission, which includes lunch on Peanut Island, is $35. Preregistration is required. Call 561-841-3389.
WED 8/20In the wake of all the American Idol fanaticism, isn't it time we got back to basics? Basics, of course, meaning people who write and perform their own songs. The Nashville Songwriters Association presents a Songwriting Workshop for all you folks who have a song and a dream. Participants should bring one original song for critique and copies for the rest of the group and can also take part in a songwriting lesson. Soon, your songs will be writing themselves and the whole country will listen in awe to your newfound grasp of songwriting. Or maybe they won't. You never know till you try. This event takes place at 7:30 p.m. at the A.M.P. Shop (776 S. Congress Ave., West Palm Beach). Cost is $5. Call 305-297-5695.