THU 10/16 Deicide is scary. Like, scary for real. Not cheesy, metal-dude scary, but genuinely frightening. Deicide is loud and fast and sinister enough to get you thrown out of the house for listening to devil's music. First, there's the band's trapped-in-the-blades-of-a-helicopter brand of metal. Then there are those lyrics: "Drink the blood and swear your love for Satan/Drag his bloody knife across your wrist/Naked bliss of a sacrifice/ You're bound upon the altar stone." That's from a little ditty called "Christ Don't Care," off 2001's In Torment, in Hell. Is Deicide trying to make people uncomfortable? Yes. Do the guys care if you think they're heathens? No. This show's going to be awesome! Check out Deicide at the Culture Room, 3045 N. Federal Hwy., Fort Lauderdale. Show starts at 8 p.m. Call 954-564-1074.
FRI 10/17On first impression, you wouldn't think tango and ballet would be the most compatible dance styles. Ballet is careful and controlled -- almost cerebral. Tango, on the other hand, expresses carefree passion. So how could one combine the two? Well, Soflo Ballet believes it has found the answer to that conundrum. The dance troupe presents Danz Tango at ArtServe (1350 E. Sunrise Blvd., Fort Lauderdale) at 8 p.m. Billed as a "ballet tango," Danz Tango mixes both styles to come up with something that (the troupe hopes) is unique. Does it succeed? You be the judge. Tickets cost $10. Call 954-537-3005.
SAT 10/18Hey, banjo players! Seriously, you out there? South Florida's not exactly known for its bluegrass tradition, but if you're the type who watches Deliverance and decides that the banjo-playing skills of the inbred mountain boys are more important than their penchant for sodomy, we have just the class for you. Ken Perlman, one of the foremost practitioners of clawhammer banjo, teaches a workshop on his style from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. today at 1232 W. Pine St., Lantana. Of course, banjo is so much more than just hillbillies, though tunes featured at this clawhammer-banjo workshop are culled primarily from the South. West Virginian fiddler Henry Reed's arrangements will get special emphasis. Reed, a colorful character to say the least, played in obscurity throughout the late 19th and early 20th centuries until a fan tracked him down in the 1960s. Now, Reed's arrangements of bluegrass standards such as "Shady Grove" have become the norm, and Reed himself is legendary -- witness his place as the primary focus of this workshop. For those who dig this music but have zero talent, catch Ken Perlman in concert at the First Presbyterian Church (213 N. Federal Hwy., Lake Worth) at 7:30 p.m. Tickets to the workshop cost $30, while the concert costs $12. Call 561-588-4775.
SUN 10/19Ambiguous Description Alert: Dinosaur Construction Unit started as a punk band called the Moldy Figs back in 1997, yet has evolved to include jazz, jam-rock (yes, it has a 38-minute song), bluegrass, fusion, experimental, alt-rock, and progressive rock. DCU consists of Thelonious Rex on vocals and guitar, the Dragonfly on fretted and fretless bass, and Rod the Pipe Man on drums. The band's website is also somewhat ambiguous. There's a drawing of a dinosaur in a hardhat and a photo of the guys holding power tools. But that only adds to the mystique of a band that describes itself as King Crimson meets Sonic Youth meets Phish. Confused yet? Great! Check out DCU at Dada, 52 N. Swinton Ave., Delray Beach. Show starts at 10 p.m. and is free. Call 561-330-3232.
MON 10/20Message to the baby boomers and the Me Generation -- your time is nearly at an end. Can you imagine the day when Generation X takes over the reins of leadership in this country? Yeah, that's all right. Neither can Gen X. The point is, you're getting old. But it's OK. It happens to the best of us. After all, the only sure thing in life is that no one gets out alive. But that's no reason to get all cantankerous in one's old age, spending all day whittling a stick, rocking in a chair, and screaming at the neighborhood kids to get off one's lawn. Carol Lerner leads "The Adventures of Aging" at the Morikami Museum (4000 Morikami Park Rd., Delray Beach). Lerner, a certified gerontologist, leads a discussion on viewing aging as evolution rather than a decline. One should always grow, no matter what the age, she says. So the next time the kids don't call, maybe you'll be too busy to care. Class lasts from 1 to 3 p.m. and costs $40. Call 561-238-0262.
TUE 10/21Remember Macaulay Culkin, the angel-faced star of Home Alone? Well, like most child actors, he was plunged into that whole drug-and-alcohol-binge phase, holding up liquor stores and doing coke off a midget's ass (well, that's what it said in The Star!). His new movie, Party Monster, does nothing to sweeten his image. Culkin plays Michael Alig, the New York City club kid who latched onto club fixture James St. James (played by Seth Green) in the early '90s and eventually eclipsed the man who was his mentor in a swirl of fake blood and eyelashes. Part All About Eve, part Bret Easton Ellis-inspired debauchery, the movie documents the drug- and power-fueled rise and calculated fall of Alig, after he brags on national television of murdering his drug dealer. Kids these days! Party Monster is now showing at Sunrise Cinemas Gateway, 1820 E. Sunrise Blvd., Fort Lauderdale. Call 954-763-7994 for times.