Best Martini

i>New Times sent an operative to Dakotah 624, but reports that followed were clouded in a hangover. Apparently, the night began at this hipster bar, which seems plucked from the shores of South Beach, with a "Dakotah's bonsai pineapple" martini. It's one of those trendy cocktails made with coconut rum and vodka soaked so long in fruit that the concoction tastes like it came out of a Kool Aid pitcher. Things got cloudy after that. There was apparently a round of "the Jake" martinis, a gut-busting brew of tequila and Tabasco served in a glass dipped in Cabernet and frozen to look like an odd-shaped popsicle from hell. Then came the "twisted sister," which, unfortunately for our inebriated taster, did not feature Dee Snider. Instead, it's a tart blend of lime gin and lemon vodka. About this time, the bar crew came by to clear out dinner tables, making way for a dance floor that materialized SoBe-style. It's not clear what came next, but from the bill (martinis range from $8 to $12) and the chocolate stain on the reporter's notebook, it appears the night ended with a "white chocolate martini." That's a mixture of orange Stoli, amaretto, Godiva white chocolate liqueur, and powdered sugar, all in a chocolate-rimmed glass. It's enough to make any hangover a little sweeter.