Best Weathercaster

Look, we don't want to rain on weathercasters' parades, but they are at the very bottom of the television news ladder. Half of them steal their forecasts from the National Weather Service, and they're still wrong a lot. Their greatest talent, generally speaking, is the ability to pretend they're looking at an imaginary map. And then there's the fine art of determining whether a particular day is "partly sunny" or "partly cloudy." Weathercasters are often relegated to clown status, like Al Roker, Willard Scott, and Brian Norcross. That's why we prefer weather babes. You know, beautiful blonds like Dale Gribble's wife on King of the Hill. Then there's Pamela Wright, a brunette. Raven-haired, really. The woman clearly has a very high heat index. And we'd really love to find her dew point. (You gotta love weather double-entendres, don't you?) Keep castin' Pamela. Only please, please, stay away from the sidelines of football fields. We like our sports analysts to know what the hell they're talking about, no matter how hot they might be.

Readers Choice: Jackie Johnson, WSVN-TV (Channel 7)