If you're bummed out that Cedric the Entertainer canceled his Friday performance at the Office Depot Center, don't sweat it; at least now you have fewer decisions to make -- and more money to spend -- as a slate of top-notch comics comes to town this week.
Lampanelli stumps Whitey -- and every other ethnic group, too.
Though Tracy Morgan's post-Saturday Night Live sitcom The Tracy Morgan Show had the shelf-life of leftover sushi, Morgan's found a home at Comedy Central, taking residency as Spoonie Luv on Crank Yankersand host of Comic Groove. Maybe Morgan's departure from the ranks of NBC regulars is some kind of karmic fallout from the time he ordered SNL executive producer Lorne Michaels to, "Get me a Coke, bitch." Sure, it was only a skit, but the fact remains that SNL greatly benefited from Morgan's amusing characters (Dominican Lou) and celebrity impersonations (Star Jones). Morgan performs July 8 through 10 at Uncle Funny's Comedy Club (9160 State Rd. 84, Davie). Tickets cost $22.50. Call 954-474-5653.
Also appearing at Uncle Funny's is self-styled insult comic Lisa Lampanelli. If Don Rickles and Archie Bunker starred in My Two Dads, Lampanelli would be their vinegar-tongued daughter. Try to name one ethnic group she hasn't made fun of, and you'd be stumped -- just like the confused Caucasians who visit Lampanelli's website for a round of "Stump Whitey," her online "educational" game. Lampanelli's stand-up act is much of the same, meaning you'd better leave your ethnic pride at the door. The Queen of Mean performs July 14 through 18. Tickets cost $20.
Sure, he's a bit of a clown, but Steve Marshallain't no dummy. Nope, that boy's got some brains in him; at least enough for David Letterman, who employed Marshall as a writer for The Late Show. Marshall's style relies on a sharp mind and a complete inability to properly behave himself. What does Marshall's misbehavior entail? Actually, it's nothing too controversial in itself, just a little good-old-fashioned honesty. But we all know that can get you in the wrong situation, especially in today's super-sensitive, politically correct climate. Marshall performs with Leigh Kessler at the New York Comedy Club (8221 Glades Rd., Boca Raton) July 8 through 10. Tickets cost $12. Call 561-470-6887.
Jeff Dunham is as much a ventriloquist as a comedian. Naturally, this means Dunham's stand-up act is shared with his puppet partners, Peanut (a pot-bellied, purple woozle), Jose Jalapeño (a jalapeño on a stick), and Walter, the bald-headed, terminal curmudgeon and crowd favorite. You may feel a little woozy (pun alert!) at the thought of a puppet show, but come on, this is a comedy show, not Sesame Street Live; just one line from Walter makes Oscar the Grouch look like a Teletubby. Dunham comes to the Palm Beach Improv (550 S. Rosemary Ave., Ste. 250, West Palm Beach) July 8 through 11. Tickets cost $21.20. Call 561-833-1812.
Just think, if South Florida had this much high-quality entertainment every week, us locals wouldn't need to spend our leisure time watching Paris Hilton struggle to be lower-class. We already know how classy she is. -- Jason Budjinski