FAU President Mary Jane Saunders Resigns
By Chris Joseph
Bahamas Trip Leads to No Leads in Karp Case
By Kyle Swenson
Rich Moms Hire "Disabled" Guides at Disney World
Man on Honeymoon Busted for Soliciting Prostitute
Fort Lauderdale Officials Respond to The Onion
High School Student Expelled Over Shooting Rumor
Mortons' Food Porn Pic Helps Feds Nab Thieves
Marco Rubio Calls For Non-Existent IRS Commissioner To Resign
1. Four more years of Jenna’s cleavage televised.
2. The Geneva Convention is for pussies.
3. That Rumsfeld makes me all tingly down there.
4. So what do you have against stem cells?
5. Ambiguity, nuance, and humility have no place in geopolitics today.
6. His environmental policy won’t kill you. It’ll only make you stronger.
7. Did you notice that bulge in the crotch of his flight suit? The terrorists sure as shit did.
8. If he wins, it means presidential candidate Dick Cheney next time. That means the Dick ticket: Cheney/Armey in 2008.
9. $400 billion deficits are the gift that keeps on giving. What else can you leave to your grandchildren?
10. A vote for Bush will at least be counted.
Find everything you're looking for in your city
Find the best happy hour deals in your city
Get today's exclusive deals at savings of anywhere from 50-90%
Check out the hottest list of places and things to do around your city