I am matron -- hear me roar! Madison Avenue, take note: 55 to 70 is the new 18 to 30. Metrosexual is out; menopausal is in. And FYI, the only baking today's Sweet Potato Queens are doing is in the tanning bed. When they're not lining up to see Menopause the Musical, these forever-young geezerettes are busy shopping for plus-size thongs and shagging their boy toys. Small wonder, then, that the producers of Menopause, after a year of sold-out seats at the Rose and Alfred Miniaci Performing Arts Center(3100 Ray Ferrero Jr. Blvd., Davie) have decided the numbers are too big to ignore. The show will go on until... whenever! Or until you and your midlife gal pals have all seen it 20 times, minimum! Author Jeannie Linders, who hails from Orlando, purportedly struck this particular vein of gold over a glass of wine and a hot flash. In the production, four female stereotypes (housewife, washed-up soap star, power suit, former flower child) break into spontaneous change-of-life lyrics celebrating yet another of Fate's massively cruel jokes on the fairer sex. For example: That full head of hair your husband lost at 35? It's going to reappear 20 years later on your chin. Tickets cost $39.50. Call 954-462-0222. -- Gail Shepherd
New Year's pre-funk
If the holidays have left your wallet tapped and your ears yearning for something, anything, other than Christmas music, check out the eclectic pop sounds of Dreaming in Stereo during a free show at Alligator Alley (1321 E. Commercial Blvd., Oakland Park). According to front-man Fernando Perdomo, the Miami-based group considers its offerings as "the classic rock of the future." We're not sure exactly what that entails, but apparently it includes a flute player and a bassist named Father Bloopy.
Formerly the Fernando Perdomo Band, DIS takes cues from innovative rockers such as Todd Rundgren, the Beatles, and Nick Drake. The mix between creative and classic results in a worthy sound. Get your New Year's groove started early when Dreaming in Stereo plays Alligator Alley on Wednesday, with an opening act TBA. It's free. Call 954-771-2220, or visit www.alligatoralleyflorida.com. -- Saadia Van Winkle
Somewhere between Woody Allen and Larry David lies playwright Neil Simon, whose work is a barbed blend of social insight and homespun sweetness. Through February 4, South Floridians have the chance to see Simon's California Suite performed at Broward's Stage Door Theatre (8036 W. Sample Rd., Coral Springs). The comedy tracks four oddball couples who have checked into a ritzy Beverly Hills hotel the weekend of the Academy Awards gala (see Stagebeat review). Defining irony, the film version of the play was nominated for an Academy Award when it was released in 1978. Yes, the movie is probably available on video, but do yourself a favor and see the play -- people will think you're cultured! Tickets ($26 to $29), are available at www.stagedoortheatre.com. Call 954-344-7765. -- Larry Carrino
They Want You to Want Them
"We're all all right! We're all all right!" Well, no shit, Cheap Trick. How many other '70s power-pop bands still successfully tour the country every year? That's what we thought. This time around, however, the Trick ain't so cheap (50 bucks, to be exact). The band performs Monday at the Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino (1 Seminole Way, Hollywood). Call 954-523-3309, or visit www.ticketmaster.com. -- Jason Budjinski