Blue Huh?

The pent-up "whatever" down in the nether

Twenty-nine-year-old Bryan, tall with dark hair and eyes, said, "I don't have anything enlightening to say about blue balls except for the fact that they suck."

"So," I queried, "you had them when you were a teenager?"

"Shit, I still get 'em."

Alvaro Diaz-Rubio

"How long do they last?"

"Until you take care of business."

"When was the last time you had the alleged blue balls?"

"Six months ago," he answered. "The girl got off before I did, and that was the end of it."

For clarity, I asked, "She just got off before you did, and she was, like, 'Stop'?"


"Did you ever have sex with her again?"

"No. Actually, you know what happened? Two girls in a row, actually. You wake up in the morning and you're just sore."

"Until when?"

"Until TCB [taking care of business], which is also one of the great hangover cures, by the way. Grease, TCB, and Diet Coke is the greatest hangover cure. Diet Cherry Coke, that's the new crack cocaine."

The Clubs

Lush, 3074 NE 33rd Ave., Fort Lauderdale

Saltbox, 900 E. Sunrise Ln., Fort Lauderdale

Poor House, 110 SW Third Ave., Fort Lauderdale

Maguire's Hill 16, 535 N. Andrews Ave., Fort Lauderdale

Automatic Slims, 15 W. Las Olas Blvd., Fort Lauderdale

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