Flat Earth

See the world through old maps

FRI 2/4

Chart a course to the Miami International Map Fair.
Chart a course to the Miami International Map Fair.
Drinks are the only things tini at the Martini Bar.
Mike Gorman
Drinks are the only things tini at the Martini Bar.
What do you call a pimped-out Italian car? A Blinguini!
Mike Gorman
What do you call a pimped-out Italian car? A Blinguini!

Who needs a 1763 map of Philadelphia anyway? Find out when 50 antique-map dealers from around the world -- armed with newfangled Mapquest printouts and rental car keys -- descend on the Miami International Map Fair to show off their collective cartographic booty. Want to give the old Antiques Roadshow treatment to that yellowing map you found rolled up in the attic? Bring it on.

The event kicks off on Friday, when you can "have dinner with other map enthusiasts." Saturday, choose between going on a boat tour or jumping in on the discussion about "The Controversial Continent: the Image of Florida in Early Maps." In the afternoon, for the main event, an expert from the Library of Congress chatters about Lewis and Clark. Sunday, decide whether to go on the "crime coach tour" -- a.k.a. a field trip to Gianni Versace's mansion, the Miami City Cemetery, and the historic Miami Beach home of Al Capone -- or hunker down and learn all about "Portolan Charts: Vital Tool in the Age of Discovery." The fair takes place at the Historical Museum of Southern Florida (101 W. Flagler St., Miami). Admission is $10. Visit www.historical-museum.org, or call 305-375-1492. -- Dave Amber

Hollywood Goes New Orleans

How'd you get those beads?

FRI 2/4

They say there are two types of sufferers in the world: those who suffer from too much life and those who suffer from not enough. To which we add, "If you're wondering what type you're dealing with, take them to Mardi Gras." Kicking things off Friday and plodding on through Tuesday, the City of Hollywood plays host to a series of Mardi Gras events, including a $1,500 costume contest (at 9 p.m. Friday), a float parade (at 6 p.m. Saturday), and a Fat Tuesday blowout concert with the BBS Allstars, Les Dudek of the Allman Brothers, and more (10 p.m. Tuesday). The carnival atmosphere offers plenty of opportunities for you to overindulge and to determine the suffering typology of thousands. All events are free and are divided between Young Circle Park (Federal Highway and Hollywood Boulevard) and the Broadwalk (Johnson Street and A1A). Call 954-926-3377, or visit www.mardigrasfiesta.com. -- Jeff Megahan

No Scrubs

Every Wednesday is girls' night out

WED 2/9

Guys have Hooters, where waitresses wear short-shorts while passing out chicken wings. Guys have Sofa Kings sports bar, where female servers don schoolgirl uniforms while pouring drafts. And guys have strip clubs, where... you know. It's about time the girls had a place to chill out and objectify men for a change. During "Ladies First" nights each Wednesday at Martini Bar (300 SW First Ave., Fort Lauderdale), women have the place all to themselves until 11 p.m. Dudes have to stay outside -- except for the buff male dancers (on loan from La Bare ladies' club), who serve complimentary cocktails and appetizers while Sex and the City episodes play and sponsors pass out prizes like gift certificates for manicures. The "hassle-free ladies' nights" start today. Call 954-764-4345. -- Deirdra Funcheon

Ferrari Safari

SAT 2/5

Before pimped-up jalopies were all the rage, a car's worth was in its manufacturing. You won't see gold rims on the Lamborghinis, Maseratis, and other fine Italian autos at this year's Italiafest, taking place Saturday at Moroso Motorsports Park (17047 Beeline Hwy., Palm Beach Gardens) and Sunday at Old School Square (51 N. Swinton Ave., Delray Beach). Nope -- just well-crafted beauty. Call 561-333-5308. -- Jason Budjinski

 
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