Misspelled tattoo: 5 points. Misspelled tattoo in Latin: 20 points. Wilted, fallen Mohawk 5 points. Gutter punk imposter 3 points (thats the guy who looks like a penniless gutter punk, but secretly sneaks off to consume scads of $8 concessions). One of Brett Gurewitz old heroin needles (kept for nostalgias sake) 8 points. Being a first-hand witness of Pit Justice 3 points. A lone Van, brand new and separated from its owner due to excessive moshing 2 points. A one-shoed former mosher sadly surveying the crowd for his missing Van that his mother just bought him at Hot Topic 4 points. Underage drinking 2 points. Old, crossed out, straightedge tattoos on drinkers 5 points. Coked up Miami-chic talent scouts 2 points. A true gutter punk vomitting on a coked up, Miami-chic talent scout Priceless.
The list of bands is longer than the vegan hotdog line; go to www.warpedtour.com for a full list. Tickets cost $31. Visit www.ticketmaster.com. Warped Tour is a day-long festival on Saturday at Bicentennial Park (1075 Biscayne Blvd., Miami).