Showbiz Entertainment Spectacle! Wow!

You need a musical retrospective about a beloved song-and-dance man from the 1940s! It’ll be great! Just like all those other musical retrospectives about song-and-dance men from the 1940s! Ginger Rogers got one! So did Gene Kelly! They were great!

This one’s about Danny Kaye! It’s called The Kid From Brooklyn! I don’t remember Danny Kaye! Neither do you! You read New Times! You’re too young and hip for this! But that’s your loss! You don’t know about class! You don’t know about showbiz! You and your premarital sex and damnable tattoos! Danny Kaye was funny! His wife wrote his songs! But he wrote his jokes! His jokes were funnier than his songs! But his songs sounded better! Because they had instruments!

But Danny Kaye was in White Christmas! He was the guy who wasn’t Bing Crosby! He was goofy! Brian Childers will be, too! He plays Danny Kaye in The Kid From Brooklyn! Which is a new musical! About Danny Kaye! Musical! Danny Kaye! Tonight! 7:30! Maltz Jupiter Theatre! 1001 East Indian Town Road! Jupiter! 561-575-2223! $30-$35! Danny Kaye! Woot!
Fridays, 7:30 p.m.; Saturdays, 2 & 8 p.m.; Sundays, 2 p.m.; Wednesdays, 2 p.m. Starts: Aug. 3. Continues through Sept. 3