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Sexual Healing
Sad stories and otherwise freaky tales from Florida's last sexual surrogate
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Backbreaker
A half-kilo of blow, machine-gun blasts, and a millionaire chiropractor. Does this make sense?
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Switch Hitter
Before swinging a bat in a lesbian softball league, pick a side. Gay or straight? Or something else?
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To Hug a Porcupine
Three little boys set out to destroy the parents who loved them. This isn't how adoption is supposed to work.
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Awfully Wedded Wife
Bigamy charges and dozens of busts for sham marriages.It must be South Florida.
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Automatic Loveletter
Published on January 17, 2008
Juliett Simms wants you to know that she's damaged. Her band, Automatic Loveletter, just released a five-song EP full of loss, regret, pain, and feelings of inadequacy and now stands poised to capture the imaginations of sensitive, misunderstood 15-year-olds the world over. Automatic Loveletter seems almost purpose-built for this demographic, tapping the emotional veins of immaturity in a manner that manages sincerity and shuns caricature. Combining a knack for cathartic songwriting with the sensitive-boys'-sex-object appeal of the darkly attractive Simms, Automatic Loveletter is the answer to all those cute-boy-fronted emo and pop-punk bands. You know, all those pierced and tatted guys singing breakup songs to swooning crowds of teenaged girls. Well, that's sure to be in the cards for Automatic Loveletter, only with the addition of pierced and tatted guys secretly swooning in the back while trying to look cool for the girlfriends they are in constant fear of losing.