There’s a Whore in All of Us

Try and keep her happy

You work a straight-laced day job. You also go to the gym regularly, eat three squares a day, and never date more than one man at a time. Your personal hygiene habits are impeccable. So why can’t you shake the suspicion that deep down inside you’re housing a singing, dancing, Southern whore? More terrifying is your hunch that she’s planning to try and escape. (You occasionally wake from nightmares in sweaty fits mumbling “Howdy y’all! Wanna party?”.)

Here’s a bit of advice: If you let your whore out in a controlled environment – like during auditions for Best Little Whorehouse in Texas at the Lake Worth Playhouse (713 Lake Ave., Lake Worth) on Monday and Tuesday at 7 p.m. – it will keep her content. That way you’re less likely to wake up in a Tijuana jail cell with a pocketful of pesos and no recollection of the previous week.

The folks at Lake Worth Playhouse have very few requests for your inner whore. All they ask is that she prepares 16 bars of music, preferably show tunes with musical accompaniment (bring either sheet music or a karaoke-style CD; no rap or Top 40), and that she dances a little (they’ll teach her the moves). Who knows? Maybe life on the stage will suit you too. Call 561-586-6169 ext. 204, and visit www.lakeworthplayhouse.org.
Mon., Jan. 28, 2008

 
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