Holy Shatner!

God has nothing to do with Agnes at Palm Beach Dramaworks

Morgan at least seems to know this is sheer garbage. Her stilted delivery recalls William Shatner in a Travelocity commercial, and even though she's supposed to be a lapsed Catholic, she sounds like a New York Jew. For some unholy reason, she occasionally lapses into a kind of hardboiled, Marlow-esque detective persona, but the material is so dumb that she comes off like Guy Noir. These decisions can be attributable to one of only two things: recent brain surgery or a total disinterest in the piece. And Morgan has no visible scars.

Morgan, Lowe, Bradshaw: "It's dark in here! Don't come near me!"
Morgan, Lowe, Bradshaw: "It's dark in here! Don't come near me!"


Agnes of God Written by John Pielmeier. Directed by William Hayes. With Lisa Morgan, Margery Lowe, and Barbara Bradshaw. Presented through April 6 at Palm Beach Dramaworks, at 322 Banyan Blvd., West Palm Beach. Call 561-514-4042, or visit www.palmbeachdramaworks.org.

No — this is disinterest, pure and simple. And why not? The whole point of Agnes of God seems to be strong-arming us into thinking that secularism is bad, God is great, and the world would be a better place if we were all Catholic. Some will disagree and insist that there is a higher, finer meaning in all of this, but they are wrong. The play itself lies to you — claiming that there are such things as psychics who bend spoons with their minds, and stigmatas and faith healers and whatall. I know, as you should know, as Pielmeier should have known, that all of these things are for-profit quackery with no place in art — just like Catholic morals and Catholic gods. Art is the realm of the Marquis de Sade, and even the prettiest Catholic murals are mostly gay porn. Pielmeier's play is not fun, not insightful, not lyrical, and it's not even right. Also: The set is ugly.

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