Heartwarming Story

How Papa 'Pipe Raises Kids

Then, last week, the spoken-word version comes in the mail, a two-CD set (Fight, Hydrahead Records), with the author reading — reciting — sections from the book. It works. There's something of the old movie detective narrative here, a Raymond Chandler saga with a chorus of crunching bones and thudding fists. Or is it like Stacy Keach doing Mike Hammer on TV (one of the kid and the 'Pipe's favorites back in the '80s)? Whatever. The book seems to have been written to be read aloud.

Tailpipe's trying not to play the tedious proud papa here. It's just that he keeps marveling at the way things turn out. Could this Eugene kid, this pushy, pugilistic wordsmith, have turned out entirely different if, say, the 'Pipe had just given the kid a break at Snakes and Ladders?

Twinkletoes/Mellowfin

The Miami Dolphins traded franchise player Jason Taylor last week to the Washington Redskins for two picks in next year's draft. While Taylor and former teammates have been cordial in public remarks, an email conversation uncovered by New Times shows that parting was more than just sweet sorrow.

On 7/21/08, Jason.Taylor@dolphins.com wrote:

Know you've heard my longtime wish for a trade to a more competitive team finally came true. Leaving the joys of South Beach to go north, to a playoff team. Just wanted to thank each and every one of you for your support as teammates :-). You all bled and sweated next to me, making this club what it is — the worst team in the whole league. Seeya suckas!!!

On 7/21/08, Jason.Taylor@dolphins.com wrote:

P.S. Seriously though, keep going to all my JuiceBlendz locations across South Florida for your smoothie needz. Strongly recommend #4, the Hangover Healer. It's great for those mornings after drinkin away the pain all night. Loserz!

On 7/22/08, Ricky.Williams@dolphins.com wrote:

Jason, despite our differences, you were always a solid performer on the field and a reliable teammate. Yeah, you mocked me when I had some personal issues. Dressing as me for Halloween — that year was clever, I guess. But, hey... As far as smoothies go, I prefer #2, the Immunizer. The one with extra, uh, "herbs"... LOL

On 7/22/08, Jason.Taylor@dolphins.com wrote:

Really do appreciate your kind words. You're the only teammate to email me back. Know I can be kind of aloof sometimes, but it still feels good to think you'll be missed. Sorry for any embarrassment I may have caused you, buddy.

PS. Glad you're a fan of the blendz. Next time, check out the "Dr. JB." Carrot juice and OJ with a side of *giggle* wheat GRASS! Try it around 4:20, if you know what I mean.

On 7/22/08, Ricky.Williams@dolphins.com wrote:

Whoa J, was that a little feeler there? You been "puffin the magic dragon"? LMAO

On 7/22/08, Twinkletoes99@hotmail.com wrote:

Switching over to my personal account here. Better safe than sorry when talkin about the whacky grazz. Yeah, I see the pink in Pink Floyd. Always wanted to tell you.

On 7/23/08, MellowFin@gmail.com wrote:

Wondered about that. BTW this is my home email. Let's g-chat sometime. And DAMN! Think of all the wasted opportunities...

On 7/23/08, Twinkletoes99@hotmail.com wrote:

Wasted opportunities to get wasted, bro. Should have burned one on the 50 yrd line one night. Woulda been ROFLMAO.

On 7/23/08, MellowFin@gmail.com wrote:

Bet you're deeper than I ever gave you credit for. We should totally stimulate our minds sometime. I'm gonna need it with Colonel Parcells on the case.

On 7/23/08, Twinkletoes99@hotmail.com wrote:

Sux 4 U! Sure, I'm deep. Think some shallow rookie could feel those DWS beats on that level?

On 7/24/08, Mellowfin@gmail.com wrote:

Touché, my man. You definitely have some moves. After a hit of Acapulco Gold I really tear it up too. Anyway, training camp's getting going. Whoever our coach is is waiting. TTYL!!

On 7/24/08, Twinkletoes99@hotmail.com wrote:

Been good chatting with ya. In my eyez, you Ricky Williams will always be the #6 — Peachy Keen!

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