Nostalgia Weekend Continues

Imagine: It’s a distant and strange future, and party people are preparing to go out for an evening of nostalgia. They put on their baggy Sean John jeans, pulled down past their ass to expose their Old Navy boxers, or choose one of their six, nearly identical Coach handbags before hitting the door. When they get to the club, the DJ is playing a mash-up of Fifty Cent and t.A.T.u. Everyone is laughing, “OMG, do you remember how ridiculous we were! WTF were we thinking, LOL! Look I brought my iPod!” And so begins the ΄00s party — 10 years of your life condensed into a garish succession of bad clothes, catch phrases, and shame.

Fortunately for you, we’re not in that distant future world yet. For the moment, you’ll just have to settle for reenacting an equally silly decade at tonight’s ΄70s Funk Disco Labor Day Weekend Party at Respectable Street (518 Clematis St., West Palm Beach). It will be hilarious to your modern sensibilities, because people will be wearing afros and bellbottoms and trying feebly to kung fu fight on the dance floor. You will take pictures of your girlfriend dressed as Debbie Harry under the light of the disco balls, and you will fling discarded coke straws at your friends (those are fake, right?) while the king and queen of the costumed are crowned. But as you go on indulging in your fun, think about how Barry Gibb would feel. You people are shitting on his memories. Bastards. There’s no cover — just come dressed (in)appropriately. Call 561-832-9999, or visit www.respectablestreet.com.
Sun., Aug. 31, 9 p.m., 2008