The Real Girlfriend Experience

At the second hole, she tells me how she came to her current station in life: She moved to Florida from Nebraska for college. She wanted to get out of the cold and live near the beach. Apparently, she did not consult a map before choosing a school in Lakeland, which is several hours from the water. In college, she was a business major, and she just graduated in May. During her senior year, she signed up for a website called SexyJobs.com, an adult employment site that matches men and women with pornographers and agents. She started with porn because it enabled her to work as little as twice a month and still pay all of her expenses.

Now 22, she moved to South Florida to work with a porn agency but says the money ran out quickly. "There is a lot of money for girls when they first start in porn," she tells me, trying to putt through a snaking corridor of artificial turf. "I could make $900 in a few hours. But once a girl has appeared in a few places, they don't want to pay her as much, unless you're some superstar like Jenna Jameson."

Shutterstock

Shutterstock

Related Content

• Florida Named Porn-Viewing Capital of United States: Six of Florida's Googling Habits
  April 23, 2012
• Woman Tries to Save Injured Bobcat, Ignores Authorities, Gets It Euthanized
  April 13, 2012
• Bob Marley's Birthday Tribute Show With Fourth Dimension Tonight
  February 1, 2012
• DOJ Continues to Press for Gun Charge Against Buju Banton
  March 26, 2012
• Warren Buffett Buys 63 Newspapers From Media Company, Says It Can Keep the Florida Ones
  May 17, 2012

More About

• Don Carter
• Jeff Fischer
• Bob Marley
• Bowling
• Sexuality

Like this Story?

Sign up for the Weekly Newsletter: Our weekly feature stories, movie reviews, calendar picks and more - minus the newsprint and sent directly to your inbox.

Privacy Policy Cancel Continue

With $60,000 in student loans coming due soon, she says she needed more money. She looked through hundreds of escort ads, gauging how much she might be worth. "I set a high price because I thought I could get it." She averages four calls a day, working six days a week.

A higher price also means a generally higher quality of clientele. Most of her calls are from doctors and lawyers. They're the ones who can afford that kind of cash, she says as she scoots her ball casually with her foot.

"Hey, that's cheating," I say with a playfully stern tone.

"Yeah, I'm a cheater," she says in a dry, humorless voice.

Sometimes she tells people she's from Kansas instead of Nebraska because Kansas sounds more innocent and Midwestern, she says.

Even if she isn't having fun playing minigolf, rushing through each hole, Britney doesn't seem to mind sharing her wealth of professional expertise. She takes the tone of a college professor as she explains some of the call-girl terminology. Ads often include what look like alphanumeric codes: GFE, PSE, DATY, BBBJ, K9, DFK. Those are all options, she says, like a menu.

GFE stands for "girlfriend experience," she says, which means the escort can offer more than just a dirty deed. A GFE might include kissing on the mouth, for example, or role-playing. The GFE is the promise to at least appear to be enjoying the company and not just the money.

PSE is code for "porn-star experience." A step up in intensity from a GFE, a PSE can include dynamic positioning, moaning, and the general showmanship of adult cinema. The PSE must never be mistaken for "Greek" or "a trip to Greece," which indicates the prostitute is willing to engage in anal intercourse.

DATY stands for "Dining at the Y," an indication the woman will receive oral sex. "I guess because a woman with her legs spread kind of looks like a Y," she says, leaning on her putter, tilting her head as she thinks.

A BBBJ is a "bareback blowjob," as opposed to a CBJ, a covered blowjob (with a condom).

LFK is light French kissing. DFK is deep French kissing.

I ask if anyone has ever asked her to do something she didn't want to do.

She says no, "but I'm ready to explain that I won't do something I don't want to do." Where exactly she will draw that line remains a mystery.

At the 11th hole, we debate whether we may have skipped the eighth hole. We did. Britney makes it clear we are not going back.

By hole 13, we are discussing what she'd like to do with her life. "I really like economics and marketing," she says. "I'd like to go back to school and get an MBA and maybe a master's in economics."

"What are some of your favorite economic theories?" I ask, hoping I might be able to show her that I know words like Keynesian.

"I like more of the micro than the macro," she says. "Like price control and things like that." One day, she would like to find a way for governments to pay for all the social programs without having to raise taxes.

"Any ideas?"

"No, not yet," she says as we approach the 17th hole. "See, financially I'm a conservative, but socially I'm a Democrat. I haven't even made up my mind on who I'm voting for."

Wow, a real-life swing voter.

Still thinking about economics (and still trying to work in Keynesian), I ask, "What's your dream job?"

"I'd like to work for the government one day," she says, smiling at the thought of a prostitute fashioning economic policy. "Secretly, I really want to be the next Alan Greenspan."

The 18th hole consists of two parts. First, players are to hit their balls under a small cottage, then watch as they pop out a few feet below, near the hole. Britney hits her ball under the house, lifts her putter, and heads for the door.