Gag Green

Now that the Miami Dolphins’ mission to get to the playoffs has officially gone tits up, it’s time to focus on the new task at hand. Namely, to completely eradicate the New York Jets, their loudmouth head coach and their over-hyped quarterback. Not to mention shutting up the most obnoxious fanbase in all of sportsdom.

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When the Jets hired Rex Ryan to be their coach, his first order of business was to impose himself as an insufferable, officious prick. Ryan got into a ridiculous verbal confrontation with Fins linebacker Channing Crowder through the media, and the altercation only served to heat up an already searing rivalry and take Jets’ fans’ collective idiotic blustering to off-the-charts inanity. What better way than to bring them back down to earth in a fiery heap than on Monday Night Football? The throwdown takes place at LandShark Stadium (2269 Dan Marino Blvd). Kickoff is at 8:30 p.m. and tickets start at $41. Call 1-800-FINS-TIX, or visit miamidolphins.com.
Mon., Oct. 12, 8:30 p.m., 2009