Buy a Boat, Meet a Mermaid

At first, the South Florida Boat Showseems boring. But then you imagine cutting waves from the Caribbean to Key West in a cigarette boat loaded with a couple of kilos of kush. You’re trolling for swordfish and sharks at 100 mph. There’s a drunken mermaid on the bow and a rapper pal waterskiing behind you, spitting rhymes and flashing signs. Suddenly, it’s all so awesome that you start making motor noises and screaming, “I’m on a boat, bitch!”

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More About

• Key West
• Miami-Dade County Fair Expo Center

Revving up Friday at noon, this weekend’s boat show at the Miami-Dade County Fair Expo Center (10901 SW 24th St., Miami) probably won’t be as wild and ridiculous as that nautically themed daydream. According to the official website, you should expect a bunch of middle-class “boaters, fishermen, and watersports enthusiasts” geeking out over expensive watercraft and nonessential gadgetry. But who knows? You might meet a mythical creature or two. The boat show is free for kids 14 and under. Tickets cost $5 for everyone else. Call 954-946-6164, or visit southfloridaboatshow.com.
Fri., June 11, noon, 2010