By Natalya Jones
By County Grind
By Liz Tracy
By Chris Joseph
By Liz Tracy
By Matt Preira
By Jesse Scheckner
By Michael E. Miller
Since the mid-'90s, when gangsta rap almost popped a cap in its own ass, hip-hop has become increasingly ridiculous.
We mean this in the best way possible. A big part of rap music's new wave of silly has to do with fanciful linguistic feats, resplendent with technique and cleverness. Starting with Lil Wayne in the early 2000s and right up through today's swag icons, like Odd Future and A$AP Rocky, rhyming has become increasingly linear and, more important, increasingly comedic.
This couldn't be more true than for the MCs at the other end of the humor spectrum. We're talking about Neanderthal kingpins, geniuses who have made fine art out of creative stupidity. On the blogs, Lil B is the still-reigning champion of non-sequitur hip-hop. And on the radio, courageousness is best encapsulated by the boisterous Waka Flocka Flame, who resembles Gucci Mane, if he rapped even less and shouted everything. We interpreted, here, some of that rapper's most wacky rhymes from his latest release, Triple F Life: Friends, Fans & Family.
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5. "I'm too drunk, I'm too high to hear that fuck shit/Came to the club, yeah, I'm on that fuck shit!"
If you're too drunk or high to figure out this lyric, start approaching it like an algebraic expression in which you're trying to deduce the numerical value of "fuck shit." In this case, we're pretty sure it's either "420" or "69." Or both.
4. "Spare tire in the trunk, ride with an extra shot/Spend your red money at that Benihana restaurant."
Waka Flocka Flame at Benihana? Perhaps he's cold chillin' with Steve Aoki, renowned DJ and heir to the teppanyaki-style Japanese cooking empire. Sounds like an excellent pilot for a buddy movie or a heartfelt documentary about race in America.
3. "Throwing money in the air like I don't really care/Standing on the chair like I don't really care/Got bitches by the pair, I'm baller of the year/And haters everywhere, but I don't really care/No I don't, I don't, I don't, I don't really care."
Aside from the occasional "Occupy Something" outbreak, the Facebook generation is a bunch of apathetic, apolitical, flip-flopping nihilists. Shit, even nihilists care more about the state of the world around them than your average sexting 13- to 20-year-old. The chorus of Waka's "I Don't Really Care" reflects that righteous ambivalence with poetic conviction.
2. "Bout cake plus a nigga I'm straight/Eat it out the pot/I don't need no plate."
Why does Waka Flocka Flame bake cakes in pots? This man is out of control.
1. "Now got me Ms. Scrooge nigga/I'm like Scrooge/Got a fucking duck/When I jump out nigga duck."
Whoa, there's a lot going on here. First things first: Waka establishes himself as "Scrooge" after telling us he's landed himself a Ms. Scrooge. And then he says he's "Got a fucking duck," which doesn't make any sense but is a sideways sort-of reference to late '80s children's cartoon Duck Tales. And then the pun on duck makes us wonder if Waka is a secret genius after all.