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Would it Be Pushy to Hope for Gorgonzola?

It’s sometimes baffling that anyone falls in love anymore: modern “must be met” lists for PSCs (potential suitor characteristics) are lengthier than Santa’s scroll of “naughtys.” It’s unclear when it happened, but we’ve become a demanding bunch that wants it all.

In Jeff (Curb Your Enthusiasm) Garlin’s new film, he could make do with much less. He’d settle for just having someone around that he could share a plot of grass and eat a little cheese with (although, he would prefer rice pudding.) Garlin wrote, directed, produced, and starred in his new film I Want Someone to Eat Cheese With, and did it all in a style similar to Curb, but dryer. It’s the comedic equivalent of stuffing your cheeks full of saltines and then washing it all down with more saltines. The life he’s crafted is uncomfortable to watch: He’s a 39 year-old “fat guy” who lives with his mom in a dreary, crochet-abundant Chicago apartment. His acting “career” is debatable. He’s prone to inappropriately personal outbursts (even in front of classrooms full of small children). He hasn’t had sex in five years.

During his mission for companionship and personal fulfillment, you meet an all-star cast of hilarious actors playing down the funny, with the exception of a sprightly love interest, Beth (Sarah Silverman), whose humor is so bold and alive that at points she seems to be in color while the rest are in black and white. Will Garlin’s character find love? A job? Lose weight? Hell, will he move outta his momma’s house? You’ll have to see for yourself today at 3 p.m. at Cinema Paradiso (503 SE Sixth St., Fort Lauderdale). Tickets cost $5 to $8. (You can catch it again tomorrow and Sunday as well.) Call 954-525-3456, or visit
Nov. 23-25, 2007

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