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2007 Stories by Jamie Laughlin

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  • Give Your Tree an Honorable Farewell

    published December 27, 2007

    Ahh, Christmas tree, we’ve shared a lot of good times. Remember when the cats climbed up your bushy branches and knocked you over, breaking... More >>

  • A Foreigner in Your Own Town

    published December 27, 2007

    You love Foreigner. Every time that you slide into your Camaro and pop that self-titled album in the tape deck, it truly does “feel... More >>

  • And You Can Surf on Them Too!

    published December 27, 2007

    You find solace in the ocean. Allowing yourself to examine the waves – from distant ripples, to suction-like C’s, to eventual... More >>

  • Draw Your Own Conclusions

    published December 27, 2007

    Shotgun shacks crafted entirely out of Popsicle sticks. Glittery strings of precious jewels (AKA macaroni). Minimalist renditions of life and its... More >>

  • Cerebral Ballsy

    published December 27, 2007

    It takes some major cojones to embrace the parts of yourself that you can’t change. (Who do you think you’re kidding by putting a... More >>

  • Can I Get an Amen?

    published December 20, 2007

    It’s tough being holy during the holidays. Sinners pack your church to maximum capacity in an impulsive effort for atonement, leaving you... More >>

  • Trim that Tree

    published December 20, 2007

    Aren’t you tired of making every errand on your list about others? You should be. Taking a little time for you is the key to enjoying the... More >>

  • You Only Hurt the Ones you Love

    published December 20, 2007

    If there’s a lesson to be learned from watching Before the Devil Knows You’re Dead, it’s this: Never have children.... More >>

  • The Night the Earth Stood Still

    published December 20, 2007

    Tonight the goyish are all tucked away. They’re fussing with last-minute gift wrapping, baking desserts they should have made days ago, and... More >>

  • Santa Knows how to Multitask

    published December 20, 2007

    Getting face time with the big guy is tough; his minion elves command you to stand patiently in hour-long lines and then hustle you away as soon... More >>

  • Time to See the Light

    published December 20, 2007

    Today is the Winter Solstice, meaning the earth is at its maximum tilt with the sun and you can expect progressively longer days until... More >>

  • Rock’s Chosen Ones

    published December 13, 2007

    Let the Gentiles feast on pork. It’s a small concession; after all, the Jews are taking back rock ‘n’ roll. Rob Tannenbaum and... More >>

  • You Best Believe It

    published December 13, 2007

    Frank Sinatra painted on a spider web. Two-trunked elephants. Shrunken heads. If an oddity is worthy of a proper sideshow, roadside attraction, or... More >>

  • All Reilled Up

    published December 13, 2007

    There have been many influential men throughout our country’s illustrious history: presidents, arbiters of peace, technological masterminds,... More >>

  • Make “House” Your Second Home

    published December 13, 2007

    Roaming through Jorge Pardo’s newest exhibit at the Museum of Contemporary Art (770 NE 125th St., North Miami):... More >>

  • Soap Opera

    published December 13, 2007

    There are few places in the world as scandalous as Naples, Italy. From streetside pickpockets to the maniacal scooterists and absent traffic laws,... More >>

  • Nothin’ Says “Holidays” Like Bloodsports

    published December 6, 2007

    Florida law doesn’t currently allow amateur MMA competitions, but it does allow kickboxing and grappling battles – which are violent... More >>

  • Stuff Your Fishnet Stockings

    published December 6, 2007

    Some people are just tough to shop for: namely, you. With the stocking stuffing, gift wrapping, and assorted p.r.n. (present-related nonsense)... More >>

  • Always Let the Wookiee Win

    published December 6, 2007

    When people belittle your comic book collection, you want to bulge through your checkered shirt and cutoff shorts, turn green, and release a... More >>

  • Proof That It’s Better to Give Than to Receive

    published December 6, 2007

    So many things are indicative of the holidays. Roasted Chestnuts. An extra leaf added to the dining room table to accommodate your friends and... More >>

  • Let Rover Show You his Wish List

    published December 6, 2007

    The Worth Avenue Pet Parade is always as much royal spectacle as it is entertainment. Where else can you see pets and owners wearing matching nail... More >>

  • Weekend Flavor: Just Add Basel

    published December 6, 2007

    You gotta figure that Miami is overrun about three times a year: (1) for Art Basel, which is happening immediately and through Sunday, so... More >>

  • A Saint he Ain’t

    published November 29, 2007

    Reverend Bob Levy wouldn’t be the best counsel to seek out for confession – unless you consider being called a pussy-ass fag boy... More >>

  • This is a Public Service Announcement -- With Cartoons!

    published November 29, 2007

    For a band as integral to music’s history as the Clash, it seems odd that few fans know much about it; a revelation that doesn’t strike... More >>

  • It's Been on Your Nightstand for a Decade

    published November 29, 2007

    The holidays are a time for catching up with old friends, lettin’ ´em know how much you appreciate them and then getting wasted... More >>

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