Email Author Jamie Laughlin

2008 Stories by Jamie Laughlin

• “He Writhes on the Floor, Like a Cockroach Playing the Sax”

  published December 18, 2008

  You have to wonder what thoughts crossed the policeman’s mind who wandered into Radio-Active Records one recent night. Unable to be... More >>

• Tonight We Wake the Art Monster

  published December 18, 2008

  On the surface, West Palm Beach appears to be an ordinary, well-heeled city. Look deeper and you’ll find a subculture hell-bent on pushing... More >>

• A Plague of Santas

  published December 18, 2008

  As a child, you found him suspicious. Why would a magical dude like Santa spend his days greeting children at shopping centers? Shouldn’t he... More >>

• Santa, Baby

  published December 18, 2008

  Around the holidays, the general population can be divided into two categories: those who are getting some, and those who are not. If you wish... More >>

• Get Real

  published December 18, 2008

  You can only see a handful of Lichtenstein and Warhol knock-offs before you start demanding answers: Where is pop art going? Does it still exist?... More >>

• Be The Light

  published December 18, 2008

  Let the Christians and seculars have their Santa, he’s a wimp anyway. If the fat man were ever faced with fist to face combat, you can be... More >>

• Love Avery for his Body

  published December 18, 2008

  A drizzle of Matisse here, a scatter of Picasso there. Finding a well-rounded body of an artist’s work in one location can be unbearably... More >>

• Klaatu Barada Nikto

  published December 18, 2008

  When the aliens do invade, will you be ready? Will you bake them a welcome wagon gift or celebrate your Second Amendment rights by stockpiling... More >>

• Buy Your Inner Child a Candy Apple

  published December 18, 2008

  One of life’s cruelest tricks is that we become hardened with age. For children, everything is fascinating, but as our timeline’s tail... More >>

• Let's All Move to the Land of Sweets

  published December 4, 2008

  For eleven months of the year, South Floridians live in a state of perpetual summer. But every December, something magical happens: We celebrate... More >>

• Does Good Puppy Wanna Go For a Walk?

  published December 4, 2008

  It’s happened again: you get home on Tuesday night and you can’t even enjoy your evening — your mind is consumed with the number of... More >>

• “I Don’t Care! I’d Rather Sink Than Call Brad for Help!”

  published December 4, 2008

  Some styles cannot be duplicated, only ripped off. That’s the case with artist Roy Lichtenstein, the man responsible for redefining... More >>

• Lab Journal

  published December 4, 2008

  Removal of subjects’ temporal lobes reveals an absence of typical grey matter in these outwardly normal cranial cavities. In what would,... More >>

• When Convictions Become Crushing

  published December 4, 2008

  Religion can be considered either part of our human makeup or a great distraction. But when that passion no longer allows for outside thought to... More >>

• We’re So Poor We Don’t Even Have a Language!

  published November 27, 2008

  Mel Brooks has always stood out as a true comic’s comic. He has a knack for bringing the most showbizzy of all showbiz elements to the... More >>

• Here, There, and Nowhere

  published November 27, 2008

  Scranton, Pa., certain parts of Davie, and basically any red state from the last election could fit the description “The Middle of... More >>

• A Well Respected Man

  published November 27, 2008

  Our country was invaded in the early sixties, not by gun-toting militiamen, but by axe-wielding Brits. Such a well-received war on the U.S. status... More >>

• I’ll be Your Puppet If You’ll Ride Shotgun

  published November 27, 2008

  New Orleans has its own force of gravity -- it's stronger and more targeted than the scientific law governing the rest of nature. At feeding time,... More >>

• Hide and Go Seek, Art

  published November 27, 2008

  You don't usually find hand-painted, wooden dildos peeking out of the shrubbery in downtown Fort Lauderdale. While you might wish that you could,... More >>

• Rex Stars

  published November 20, 2008

  Florida wasn't always a dangly spindle of over-priced real estate. Just a quick couple hundred million years ago it puzzled its way through... More >>

• The Earth: One Hot Mess

  published November 20, 2008

  It’s official: We’ve managed to damage all that is fundamentally good about Earth. From poisoning the water supplies with oil spills and... More >>

• You Have Reached Brewtopia

  published November 20, 2008

  Ballerinas are of a gentle lineage. They can leap over our heads like catapulting pop-up toys and twist dexterously like rubber chickens, but they... More >>

• Nothin’ Says “I Love You”

  published November 20, 2008

  Most years, holiday shopping entails running to Walgreens at the last second, scoring a bag of stale circus peanuts and a bottle of Designer... More >>

• Heaven Just Got Dreamier

  published November 13, 2008

  Guys never got it. They scoff at our dusty paperback copies of Valley of the Dolls, and doubly so at our coveted DVD collector reissues of the... More >>

• Really, Go Out With Him

  published November 13, 2008

  The late ’70s were an interesting time for pop music. Punk, new wave, and rock grappled each other in a sweaty, lust-fueled, ménage... More >>