Email Author Tara Nieuwesteeg

2009 Stories by Tara Nieuwesteeg

• Real Men Drink Microbrews

  published April 30, 2009

  Bars are pretty much like hunting grounds — everyone's looking to trap a tight-tailed, doe-eyed trophy. Personally, I'm not a big fan of... More >>

• Wastin' Away at Hibi House

  published April 23, 2009

  It seems as though the quaint little archway at the front of Hibiscus House serves as a magic portal that lands visitors squarely in Key... More >>

• A wave of sweaty, half-naked buff dancers awaits at Sea Monster

  published April 9, 2009

  I was at Sea Monster nightclub,... More >>

• Wondering How to Pronounce Fuci-Fino? Fuck If We Know.

  published April 2, 2009

  I was at Fuci-Fino’s,... More >>

• Sports Bar Score

  published March 26, 2009

  Sidelines Sports bar buzzes with healthy conversation as basketball flickers on the many flat-screen television screens. Men, many still in... More >>

• Wish Granted

  published March 19, 2009

  You've got a penny, so chuck it down the well and make a wish. What do you wish for? A million bucks? A pet pony? A pet porn star? One... More >>

• Every Day Is Green

  published March 5, 2009

  St. Patrick's Day is the greenest, most wonderful day of the year, a day we celebrate free-flowing liquor, drunken shenanigans, lightly... More >>

• Bar Love, Exposed

  published February 26, 2009

  I sat there in silence at the bar inside Nippers in Boca, trying not to... More >>

• A Bowl of Chill

  published February 12, 2009

  I'm at this kava bar in Boca called Nakava, and I'm just about to down a bowl of the stuff. That's when the bartender remembers to give me a... More >>

• Liquid Anecdote

  published February 5, 2009

  With a name like Blue Martini, you'd expect it to be the kind of place where you could stare down into a potent concoction and mourn the bad... More >>

• Island Treasure

  published January 29, 2009

  You never know where you're going to meet your future spouse. Or pose for a drunken artist who quickly immortalizes you in crayon. Or if... More >>

• Coyote Feminism

  published January 22, 2009

  I wasn't sure why I was even going to the Coyote Ugly Saloon More >>

• YOLO just might be the place to find what you need if you had just one last night.

  published January 15, 2009

  You're going to die. But c'mon, have a martini. What better way to celebrate your own withering mortality than by having a lot of expensive... More >>

• Clowns Versus Crackhouse Shots

  published January 8, 2009

  If you've seen Killer Klowns From Outer Space, especially that scene in which they drink human blood through cotton-candy cocoons, you... More >>

• Harrison's Wine Bar serves up a tall glass of sexy

  published January 1, 2009

  Anyone who knows me knows that I'm more likely to go to a bar to whine than go to a wine bar. Most of my time is spent at dives bantering with... More >>