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Bars & Clubs

  • Best New Bar in Broward

    The Living Room - CLOSED

    Calling the Living Room a "bar" is like calling a McLaren F1 a "vehicle" or calling Jackson Pollock "messy." Really, just trying to describe a place this chic and transcendentally futuristic with regular sentences seems inadequate. On a typical Saturday night, you might find a red room full of heated bodies, pumping chest-to-chest to the music; a purple room that… More >>
  • Best Drag Show

    Late-Night Show at Lips

    "You walk in here, it's like Barbie fucked Beetlejuice," quips drag-show hostess Diva about the cabaret establishment Lips, where the disco balls outnumber the queens and performers boast such sophisticated monikers as Twat LaRue. It's Friday, and it's time for the late-night revue. Diva informs those easily offended by bawdy humor, "You've just been fucked out of a cover charge."… More >>
  • Best Pompano Beach Neighborhood Bar

    The Circus Sports Bar and Grill

    Let's get one thing straight up front: Clowns are fucking creepy. And circuses are mostly filled with sanctioned animal abuse and freaks who don't believe in gravity (until it hits them in the face). But not all big tops are bad. The Circus Sports Bar and Grill in Pompano has a fantastic collection of clowns and party animals sitting on… More >>
  • Le Tub

    Best Margarita

    Le Tub

    Dear Margarita, Weve been seeing each other for some time now, and I think weve reached a point where we should solidify our relationship. I know Ive been seeing other cocktails playing the field, so to speak but I blame that on capricious youth. They never loved me the way you do; they just wanted my pocketbook and a… More >>
  • Best Hollywood Neighborhood Bar

    O'Malley's Ocean Pub - CLOSED

    It has been said that O'Malley appeared on Hollywood Beach after the hurricane of 1926. Accounts vary as to where he came from: Some say he drifted ashore, some say he arrived by boat from the Bahamas, and some say the real story is much less interesting. One thing is certain — it doesn't matter. O'Malley's Ocean Pub is a… More >>
  • Best Fort Lauderdale Neighborhood Bar

    Alligator Alley - CLOSED

    Alligator Alley's booze selection is nonexistent. But you won't need shots, because the Alley's beer selection is kickin'. There are two brews from Unibroue, those incomparable Canadian brewers. There are Caribbean ales. Key West ales. Triple-fermented craft beers. And the bar food is prepared with an attention to detail and inventive flair that's hard to find at other watering holes.… More >>
  • Best Bar for Smokers

    Fox and Hound British American Pub - CLOSED

    Nonsmokers don't get it. They believe, in their lung of lungs, that with enough advertising campaigns and public education seminars, smokers will see the light, become converted, and quit. What they don't understand is that you smoke because it's awesome — that a cigarette with coffee or a frosty pint of beer is the Greatest Thing in the World. Sure,… More >>
  • Best Bartender

    Trixie, Maguire's Hill 16

    Finding the right bartender is like meeting a soulmate: Once it's happened, you'll never stray. If you've been fortunate enough to stumble into (or out of) Maguire's Hill 16 during Trixie's (birth name: Tricia Cline) shifts, you already know this. More charming than a Shirley Temple and wiser than a desert shaman, this red-haired libation mixer adds a dash of… More >>
  • Best Place to Get Drunk

    Original Fat Cat's

    I sometimes picture my liver in the glass bottle of vodka behind the bar. On tough days, it's in the whiskey. If this just worried you, stop reading here... because in the dark, dank world of Fat Cat's, shame isn't welcomed. I know this — I'm the regular, not you. I am not worried that this self-proclaimed acknowledgment will expose… More >>
  • Best Happy Hour in Palm Beach

    Nippers Bar & Grill

    Education is important, so cheers to learning in classrooms, and cheers to learning in bars — near FAU classrooms. And cheers to the never-ending lesson of learning one's self. Mull the following questions over discounted drinks at Nippers any time from 3 to 9 p.m. Monday to Friday. Is "happy hour" a marketing scheme designed to get you drunk? No,… More >>
  • Best Lake Worth Neighborhood Bar

    Little Owl Bar

    The stretch of Dixie Highway from West Palm to Boynton Beach is a wonderland of dive bars: the Office, Harry's Banana Farm. But the Little Owl Bar is the coziest, with its mix of blue-collar Budweiser drinkers and the Lake Worth progressive set (you shall know them by nose rings or dangly earrings). The Owl's dark main room, sticky floors,… More >>
  • Best Bar for a Philly Transplant

    The Parrot

    Not much in South Florida makes a Philly fan feel at home. It's nearly impossible to find a genuine Philly cheese steak, sports fans are more apathetic than psychopathic, and there is a haunting lack of William Penn statues. The Parrot Lounge is as close as it gets to walking down Broad Street. It's game days when the Parrot really… More >>
  • Best Wine Bar

    Vino

    Remember penny candy stores? Save your allowance for a few weeks and you could pick and choose among hundreds of forms of sugar. By the end of the shopping trip, there would be 30 types of candy in your bag and some change left over for next time. Vino is the grownup version of that candy store. Purchase a Vino-branded… More >>
  • Best Happy Hour in Broward

    America's Backyard

    When the powers that be decided to renovate the underused outdoor patio at Revolution Live and reinvent it as a permanent pool party, they went long on fun and short on pretension. They hired tiny, clean-cut, young barmaids; adopted the tagline "Grillin' and Chillin' "; built the center bar as a replica swimming pool; and narrowed the musical set list… More >>
  • Best Low-Rent Bar

    Ed & Elaine's Tiki Hut

    And you thought you were in the know when you discovered Le Tub! Ha! This place is so low-rent that it doesn't even have walls. There's no door, no sign, no cash register — just a thatched-roof hut decorated with bric-a-brac and a couple of tables nestled right on the shore of the Intracoastal, hidden just south of the Dania… More >>
  • Best Place to Meet Single Men

    Tailgating at Miami Dolphins Games

    You see it all the time: women flocking to ladies' nights at Dicey Riley's or the Cove, tottering in high heels and wearing shiny tank tops. Their hair is perfectly flat-ironed, their Prada bags on display. This the worst possible way to meet single men, because the competition is stiff and the men are intimidated. Oh, and it could qualify… More >>
  • Best New Bar in Palm Beach

    Hibiscus House

    We're a few hours into a happy hour at this perfect tropical garden when somebody brings up the idea of going someplace else for dinner. Sure, we all probably need something to soak up hours' worth of alcohol, but nobody likes the idea of leaving a place that feels like an ideal Old Florida backyard. Tables and chairs are scattered… More >>
  • Best Place to Play Pool

    The Village Well

    Typically, this award goes to venues that hold several pool tables, but this year's winner does not have — surprise! — more than two. Located near the docks of Port Everglades, this seafarer's bar mixes boaters, locals, and expats — all ready to share stories in between a maelstrom of shots and swears. So with the two pool tables and… More >>
  • Best Bar to Take Out-of-Towners

    Dirty Blondes

    When relatives come to town, they want to see skin. They're sick of sweaters. And they should tell you this as soon as you grab them from the airport curb. If they don't demand this — because they should be demanding this — do them the favor. Don't take them to some fancy, indoor martini bar even if they request… More >>
  • Best New Club

    Monarchy

    It took the nightlife dream team of Cleve Mash and Rodney Mayo — the guys behind Monkey Club, Respectable Street, Lost Weekend, Dada, and more — to (finally!) make it worth going out dancing again on Clematis. Two things establish Monarchy as a dance club that seems plopped out of South Beach. First, it boasts a top-of-the-line sound system blasting… More >>
  • Best Sports Bar

    The Wayward Sailor Pub

    A ship set sail many moons ago. Across a harsh, turbulent sea, the vessel pushed forward. The rugged crew, tested by times of famine and poverty, was a surly but fun bunch. When the ship docked in local waters, it brought strange and exotic spices from the faraway land of "Pitts-berg." The ship's colors were odd: a mix of what… More >>
  • Best Place to Hunt Cougars

    Christopher's

    Most people know about the endangered Florida panther, stalking the Everglades. But an even more incredible beast is the lesser-discussed (but infinitely more ubiquitous) South Florida cougar. These creatures have been spotted in bars and nightclubs up and down the coast; witnesses often report seeing them with a martini in one paw and a demur post-adolescent male cub in the… More >>
  • Best Martini

    Hendrick's Gin Martini with Cucumber at Bova Prime

    Banish from your mind those newfangled "martinis" sold in the trendy bars by unscrupulous mixologists. You know the ones. Their active ingredient is vodka, and all kinds of weak boozes have been added to the mix to make them taste like Key Lime Pie or an espresso or an Almond Joy. These drinks are often pretty, and they are often… More >>
  • Best Gay Bar

    Georgie's Alibi

    Sometimes you want a bar with a generous selection of top-shelf liquor and tasteful décor without the pretensions of a dress code. This is South Florida, after all, and you live here because Reefs are appropriate footwear pretty much everywhere. Georgie's Alibi in Wilton Manors boasts three polished wooden bars with marble countertops, good booze, and awesome specials, including $1… More >>
  • Best Specialty Drink

    Mystery Drink at the Mai-Kai

    The Mai-Kai was a mini Polynesian theme park in the middle of Fort Lauderdale when Fort Lauderdale consisted only of a beach and a few condos. Except for some recent, hurricane-induced renovations, the restaurant hasn't changed much since its opening in 1956. Its over-the-top jungle décor, flowing rivers, and roadside torches remain. The drinks are your typical island-vacation fare, except… More >>
  • Best Strip Club

    Scarlett's Cabaret

    The taxicab top in front of you at the stoplight advertises Scarlett's Cabaret. This is spotted as you drive to work, and you curse your keen detective eye, because maybe this Tuesday you wouldn't have been thinking of naked ladies during office hours. And now the unreasonable side of you already has you positioned in front of the main stage… More >>

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