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"OK, Chris, I'll level with you -- my boy really is that stupid."
"OK, Chris, I'll level with you -- my boy really is that stupid."

Luvin' It

SAT 12/6

How would you like to see some great tennis, rub elbows with tons of celebrities and topnotch athletes, and see and be seen with all the beautiful people? Well, that type of thing is happening in Delray Beach this weekend. The Chris Evert Celebrity Tennis Classic to benefit the Ounce of Prevention Fund's fight against drug abuse is Saturday and Sunday at the Delray Beach Tennis Center (201 W. Atlantic Ave., Delray Beach).

So I'm sure the first question is, who will be there? For starters, host Chris Evert, a six-time U.S. Open champ with 18 career grand-slam titles under her belt. Joining her are the likes of former President George Bush, Friends star Matt Perry, comedian Chevy Chase, Victoria's Secret supermodel Frederique, NBC Dateline's Stone Phillips, and two-time Indy Racing Champion Helio Castronevese. Oh, and all the professional tennis players, like Maria Sharapova, Xavier Malise, Luke and Murphy Jensen, Lisa Raymond, and Wendy Turnbull.

Yeah, quite a list. The tennis action starts each day at 11 a.m. Single-day tickets range from $30 to $80, and box-seat packages are also available. If you are a box-seat holder, you can attend a reception to kick off the weekend's events Friday night at the Boca Resort. There will also be a black-tie dinner at 6:30 p.m. Saturday. Call 800-233-3123. -- Russ Evans

War Memorial lives up to its name

-- this is fargin' war!

SAT 12/6

What's the last good fight you saw? If it was between two housewives tugging at the latest video game for their spoiled brats at the post-Thanksgiving sales mayhem, you need to get out more.

Saturday, the Absolute Fighting Championships bring their brand of martial-arts warfare to War Memorial Auditorium (800 NE Eighth St., Fort Lauderdale) at 7 p.m.

This is what fighting is all about, where men are men and women pretty much look like men. No Xmas cheer. That crap is for a mall! Tickets range from $15 to $35. Call 954-828-5380. -- Russ Evans


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