I have an existential map. It has 'you are here' written all over it." Oh, Steven. When will you stop questioning life and just learn to love yourself? It's a real downer. Eh, but you can't help but laugh at Steven Wright's deadpan humor and outsider view of the world. He was kind of like the original emo kid, but instead of crying into his journal, he turned his pain and confusion into laughter with zingers like "Is it weird in here, or is it just me?" and "I had a friend who was a clown. When he died, all his friends went to the funeral in one car." Why can't we all be more like Steven? Check him out at the Broward Center for the Performing Arts (201 SW Fifth Ave., Fort Lauderdale) at 8 p.m. Tickets cost $10 to $29. Call 954-462-0222. -- Audra Schroeder
Making Joyful Noises
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Your body, as the ten performers in the TranZenDance company show you, is the most versatile musical instrument ever. During their Rhythm of the Soul concert, these ladies stomp, clap, and pulsate to traditional African beats, tossing in elements of modern dance, jazz, and tap. The show includes an improv dance session with live music. So quit worrying about the extra ten pounds, that imperfect nose, that third nipple, and celebrate yourself! Things get shaking at 8 p.m. and again Sunday at 2 p.m. at the University Center for the Performing Arts (2240 SW 70th Ave., Davie). Tickets cost $10. Call 954-260-4972. -- Deirdra Funcheon
We Built This City...
We're not sure about the first city, but the Second City must be contaminated with some kind of weird, infectious substance, because every decent actor who's entered it comes out as a Saturday Night Live cast member. Seriously, just about every funny person you can think of -- Bill Murray, Chris Farley, Mike Myers, Jon Lovitz, Molly Shannon, Tracey Ullman, Julia Louis Dreyfus, Jerry Stiller, Dan Aykroyd, John Candy, Rick Moranis, and Martin Short (probably more, but that's all we could think of) -- developed their skills in improvisational and sketch comedy with this Chicago-based theater group. Now that we've told you about how legendary and fantastic it is, guess what? There aren't any tickets left! Ha ha ha! Just kidding. At press time, Second City had added a fifth night to its otherwise sold-out run at the Kravis Center (701 Okeechobee Blvd., West Palm Beach). If you can get them, tickets cost $25. Show starts at 7 p.m. Call 800-572-8471. -- Deirdra Funcheon