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With its glittery M on the door, the DJ booth in the kitchen, the polished sheen of silver-and-white marble, and the walls of flat screens pulsing like blue strobes, Café Martorano looks as much strip club as supper club. Lines snake out the doors on weekends, and the wait for a table can be up to three hours. Owner/chef Steve Martorano is a gigantic, 240-pound fish in our little pond, attracting celebs like Ludacris, Shaq, and the cast of The Sopranos to chow down on his baseball-sized meatballs, grilled octopus, veal Sinatra loaded with fresh lobster meat, gourmet Philly cheese steaks, and a menu of high-profile South Philadelphia Italian-American classics. Everything's cooked to order with the best ingredients -- EVOO, San Marzano tomatoes -- so don't even think about asking for substitutions. As the line on the bottom of the menu warns: "Don't Break Balls!"