The Marine (PG-13)

Action/Adventure 93 October 13, 2006
By Luke Y. Thompson
WWE champion John Cena plays a marine so elite he can uncover al-Qaeda fortresses in Iraq. But as those who've seen him beat up Vince McMahon know, he has a problem with authority. Discharged from the service and fired from his first civilian job for getting in a fight, he's on a nice peaceful vacation with his wife (Kelly Carlson) when he happens to run afoul of a gang of diamond thieves led by Robert Patrick. A lengthy chase through the apparently alligator-infested swamps of South Carolina ensues. As an action hero, Cena's no Rock, though he could be the next Roddy Piper -- except for the fact that he appears to be taking his catchphrase "You Can't See Me" too literally, becoming a peripheral player in his own movie. Patrick and henchman Anthony Ray Parker dominate, the latter hilariously recounting childhood traumas involving rock candy. Tongues are planted firmly in cheek; it's impossible to endorse a full-price ticket, but fans of campy action should check this out.
John Bonito John Cena, Kelly Carlson, Drew Powell, Robert Patrick, Jon Bennett, Abigail Bianca, Ashley Lyons, Anthony Ray Parker, Remi Broadway, Kelly Steves Michelle Gallagher, Alan B. McElroy Joel Simon 20th Century Fox

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