Five Theories Behind the Real Reason Jay-Z and Beyoncé Went to Cuba
We have some theories.
5. Cuba Is a Beautiful, Exciting, and Unusual Place to Vacation
Those who subscribe to Occam's Razor -- a logic principle that postulates the simplest answer is always the most likely -- probably think Mr. and Mrs. Carter visited the infamous island because they wanted to have a lavish experience in a hyperexotic locale.
4. Jay-Z Wants to Open the First McDonald's in Cuba After Castro Dies
You don't think the Roc-a-fella founder and former Def Jam CEO doesn't know a thing or two about diversification? Jay's empire does not stop at hit singles and successfully defeating Nas in a bid for Biggie's NYC rap throne. Case in point: The Brooklyn Nets. Sports leads to videogames, which, of course, leads to fast food. And before you know it, Jay-Z is buying out the Hamburgler and changing the country's national motto to "I'm luvin' it."
3. Castro Is Dead and Blue Ivy Was Named His Successor
Before he died and his death was covered up (or so we believe), Fidel was always a weird fucking guy. And his intense inability to avoid croaking at all costs was preceded by an evolving period of advancing senility.
2. Tupac Granted the Couple an Audience
The best argument we've heard for why Fidel is not secretly dead is that we're sure in the aftermath of his passing, the world will come to learn a great deal of about the tyrant's ultra-hush-hush covert activities. For example, hosting Tupac while he lives in exile hiding from Suge Knight. Which would explain why the Hovs dropped in. Jay wanted to see if he could rent Makaveli's hologram for his tour with Justin Timberlake.
1. Jay-Z and Beyoncé Are Members of the Illuminati
And part of being members of the Illuminati is being allowed to go to places like Cuba. How else do you think Dennis Rodman made it to North Korea?
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