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Five Ways to Spend New Year's Broke

Five Ways to Spend New Year's Broke
Anthony Verrilli

It's New Year's Eve, and you're in the mood to get down and boogie-woogie. Problem is, well, your bank account is tapped out until next payday. And then rent is due on Tuesday, so you're in a bit of a hole. A limousine, with Cristal in hand, dropping $500 for a table type of NYE isn't in the cards for you. No problem. You know County Grind has your back. We've culled a list of the top five ways to have a blast this January 31, without having to spend any of your nonexistent loot.

See also: Five Best New Year's Eve Parties for 2014

1. Attend your city's local fireworks extravaganza with a hidden fifth of your favorite sin juice in your back pocket and a pair of 3D glasses.

We use the term "extravaganza," loosely here because it all depends on where you call home. And the fifth of booze is crucial.

Take a few pulls, plop on those glasses leftover from Thor 3D before the fireworks start shooting off, and have yourself a grand old time. The 3D glasses will add another dimension to your New Year's Eve revelries. It'll be like you're tripping at MOMA, or a laser light show or something. Trust us on this.

Fort Lauderdale is having a top notch gratis New Year's Eve bash this year. It's the inaugural "Fort Lauderdale Orange Bowl Downtown Countdown." According to the website, it's touted as one of the largest New Year's Eve celebrations in Florida. There will be a free street festival with live music and a lighted ball dropping at midnight. The party is taking place between S.W. 2 St., S.W. 2 Ave. and S.W. 5 Ave.

4. Invite friends over for a Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve with Ryan Seacrest drinking and strip game.

Hey,don't get the doldrums because you're staying home again and watching TV for New Year's Eve. Embrace it. Get naughty with it. Invite as many couples and members of the opposite sex as you know over to your house for a game of "Drunken Strip Rockin' Eve." Tell them its BYOB, and that top-shelf liquor will go a long way.

How the game works? It quite simple actually.

  • Take one shot every time Ryan Seacrest makes a guest feel awkward.
  • Take one shot and remove one article of clothing every time Seacrest totally flops (like a 300-pound man in a belly flop contest) on a joke.
  • One shot every time Ryan Seacrest touches his hair.
  • Chug when Miley Cyrus twerks.
  • Take one shot and remove one article of clothing anytime Seacrest adjusts his bowtie.
  • Chug anytime anyone mentions how cold it is.

  • Remove one article of clothing anytime Dick Clark's image is shown.

3. Crash Your Neighbor's Year End Blowout.

Just walk around your gated community and find the house with the most cars parked out front. More cars mean more people, and the more people, the better your chances are of blending in. Oh yeah, wear something bland, like Sears' khakis, or something from Ann Taylor if you're a woman. You don't want to stick out.

Try not to show up empty-handed either. We recommend bringing that six-pack of Bud in your fridge. Nobody's going to turn away a person with beer in their possession. Once inside, go straight for the fridge like you've been there before, place your six pack there and grab something imported. Now mingle. Mingle, mingle, mingle.

If you don't have a handy six pack, you'll have to be creative. Maybe you have some empties in the garbage you could improvise with (you know, fill with water and attempt to fasten the bottle caps best you can). Cooking wine works too. Just try to show up with something in your hands so you don't scream "freeloader."

2. Why not Karaoke your way into the New Year?

When was the last time you did Karaoke? Don't laugh, it can be a blast if you've got the right crowd. Just gather a group of your favorite equally broke friends and find a local karaoke bar with no cover.

Belt out show tunes or Billy Idol songs all night. Tongue-in-cheek it this year, man. It's not the worst way to ring in the New Year. Look we did some leg work for you and found a free New Year's Eve karaoke event too at Boynton Beach's Greek Bistro. "Karaoke with Jammin Jimmy," even features a belly dancer.

1. Find a drunken couple leaving a hot club early and ask them for their wristbands.

This one requires a bit of reconnaissance work and having no shame helps too. Go to the trendy strip with at least four or five clubs or bars within a one-square-mile radius. Your target would be the midsize venues that are still hopping.

Don't get carried away and try to get into that extravagant Ibiza-style nightclub with Tiesto spinning with the $150 cover. It's not going to happen there. Security's too tight. You want something that's manageable. Find your target, wait outside for that right couple. You know the affable love birds, where one of them just had too much to drink. It's too bad they couldn't wait it out till midnight. Their loss is your gain though. Be nice. Smile and steady your approach. Hey, their night is done right. But yours, yours is, to quote the Beastie Boys, "ready to begin."

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