Ever since George W. Bush had to pull his dick out of the mashed potatoes (yes, it was definitely "that kind of party"), the United States of America, the politicians that govern it, and the voting populace at large have all been tied to a swinging pendulum of manic populism.
Who is really looking out for the interests of the USA and its citizens? Democrats? Republicans? The President? Definitely not Congress. Oh, oh! Is the answer Ron and/or Rand Paul? Teabag Wall Street! Sorry to be a downer, but we're not sure any of these foolios are anything less than completely full of shit.
"But then," we imagine you're wondering to yourself aloud at your cubicle that smells like defeat, "where should the public store its collective trust? Unto what sovereign Leviathan may the masses consummate the social contract?"
How about Maroon 5?
We understand your skepticism. How could Adam Levine and his pack of pretty boys be the last bastion of art and music existing für die Menschen? Well, we've got plenty of evidence to support our claim. And none of it has to do with the group members' ability to express themselves physically in a manner comparable to that of septuagenarian Rolling Stones frontman, Mick Jagger.
For starters, guitarist James Valentine will drop everything he's doing if you tweet at him and propose a game of tennis. It's true! At the beginning of March, Valentine crashed a St. Ambrose University tennis practice when he was tagged in an invitation to hit the clay.
Plus, the band as a whole has made it a point to use its fame to support progressive, proletarian-friendly charities like MoveOn, Amnesty International, and Lifebeat. The ultimate barometer, however, is a quick scan of the winners' list from the recent People's Choice Awards. Who was the People's Choice for favorite band?
You guessed it: Maroon 5.
With Owl City and Neon Trees. 8 p.m. Friday, March 29, at BB&T Center, 1 Panther Parkway, Sunrise. Tickets cost $25.75 to $75.75 plus fees. Call 954-835-7000, or visit thebbtcenter.com.