Rihanna's Instagram Greatest Hits: Reefer, Chris Brown, Thongs, and Side-Boob
5. Rihanna's Judgment Is Impaired Because She's High as Hell
Marijuana has not been known to enhance a toker's ability to make good decisions. After a few tugs off a didgeridoo that has been refashioned into a multichambered megabong, paying rent, doing laundry, and maintaining a discrete, positive public image no longer seem like values worth upholding.
And that's why chronic smokers of chronic are known to never have money on the first of the month, are always wearing the same stained-and-ripped clothing, and can't help but upload pictures of sticky icky to the internet. All of those things are bad ideas turned good ideas via a lil' somethin' somethin' called TH fucking C.
4. Rihanna Wants to Convince You That She and Chris Brown Should Be Together
Ri-ri wants you to "Like" them as a couple again, which is why she is constantly dropping pix of them together, usually canoodling. Every time it happens, the internet howls like a coyote damned by its coyote gods to forever wander an existential desert of total isolation. But maybe she thinks that after enough time, we'll all be so smitten with her retro-filtered make-out shots that we'll forget all about that time YOU KNOW WHO did YOU KNOW WHAT.
3. Rihanna Is Pal-sies With Terry Richardson
2. Rihanna Is Fine With Digging for Gold With Her Friends Watching
Rihanna clearly just wanted to let us know that you can scratch your crotch freely when on your personal jet with your paid assistant's head just inches from the itchy spot.
1. Rihanna Is a Normal Person Who Likes to Look Good on the Internet
Nearly everyone has a degree of exhibitionism embedded within their psyche, and you can usually gauge how intense the dose is by their social media avatars. Of course, pop stars would be massive narcissists. That's why they're pop stars.
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