MORE

X-Rated Run: A Florida 5K With Porn Stars, Pole Dancing, and a Climbing Boob Wall

xratedrun.jpg
Courtesy of X Rated Mud Run
Can you conquer the G-String Crawl? Dare you enter the Dominatrix Dungeon? Will you slide into the Honey Tunnel or tackle the Blue Balls Dash?

Don't worry -- you didn't fall asleep in front of the phone sex infomercials again. These are just a few of the sex-themed obstacles for consenting adults in the upcoming X-Rated Mud Run. That's right, you filthy animals. There's mud in this mix.

See also: What's Up With All the Themed 5K Races Coming to Miami?

The inaugural X-Rated Mud Run was founded and organized by Kelly Perez, owner of online erotic store sensualsteals.com. The run, created to promote sexual positivity and healthful living, is an untimed, adult-themed, 5K obstacle course and mud run for men and women of all fitness levels. The event will take place Saturday, February 22, at Mud Muckers Park in Bunnell, a town near Daytona Beach.

"We've received an amazing response to this event," Perez says. "We're really excited to launch in February... We're kind of twisting the typical physical and mental endurance test and merging it with the sexual element you'd find at an adult consumer show."

The X-Rated Run was inspired by Perez's business and her decision to lose weight.

"Being in the adult novelty business, as a female, you're going to feel self-conscious around these other women," Perez says. "I knew I needed to do something."

Perez asked her cousin to train her in obstacle exercise. She recalls the time they were working out in the park when the inspiration struck for erotic obstacles.

"I was crawling through the grass, and I said, 'I can't do this. I sell sex toys for a living; this is not my thing!'" Perez remembers. "He said, 'Just envision a penis tunnel in front of you; now CRAWL THROUGH.' I just sat there, and it was like an epiphany. I envisioned the entire obstacle course."

And instead of the usual obstacle courses, X-Rated Run is going all out.

"What would be a normal climbing wall will actually be a boob wall. It will be shaped like boobs," Perez says. "We have a penis crawl. It's going to be really wild and outrageous."

You're probably still stuck on "boob wall," but there's more. What else could possibly be offered amid this boob-grabbing and penis-dodging? The run will have beer, adult star appearances, live music, and food. Though there's no nudity allowed at the event, there will be plenty of eye candy with mud-wrestling and pole-dancing contests. For some sexy life lessons, the event will have pole-dancing demonstrations and inform attendees about how they can incorporate sex into their fitness routines.

"At first, a lot of men thought it would be a sausage fest. I was really surprised when I started receiving registrations that men and women were equal in number," Perez says. "But we're going to have both male and female adult stars, [and] the obstacles are made for both men and women. It's really a coed event. Overall, the purpose of the event is to promote fitness and to promote safe sex, which targets both genders."

Not only can registrants indulge their sweaty swamp fantasies but they can also do good while they're at it. In addition to advocating safe sex and drawing attention to Florida's high STD rates, the X-Rated Run will donate a portion of its proceeds to Clitoraid, a nonprofit association that aims to build a "pleasure hospital" in Burkina Faso, West Africa, which will offer free medical services for the physical restoration and rehabilitation of female genital mutilation victims.

"This is the only hospital in West Africa that will treat the victims of this barbaric procedure that can affect them the rest of their lives... It's something we as Americans could never imagine being exposed to," Perez says. "If we're able to expand and grow nationwide, we want to be able to support so many sex-positive organizations that nobody hears about. You can't put them on ABC News."

Registrants will receive a free X-Rated Run T-shirt, one free beer ticket, a condom-wrapper-shaped medal, and entry into the Post-Run Party, on top of a whole lot of heavy-breathing fun.

"The obstacle sport is about camaraderie and building a community of support. That's why I fell in love with it," Perez says. "We have this innate want to socialize and make friends, so that's what these events are for, and at the same time being able to promote safe sex, have fun, and maybe lose some weight."

Early registration for the X-Rated Mud Run costs $45 per person through October 1. From October 1, to February 14, registration costs $65, and after February 15, registration before the event costs $85. If you are entering as a team, each person saves $5 off registration.

Inspired to head north for the naughty event? New Times readers can enter promo code NEWTIMES to receive a $5 discount on registration.

The X-Rated Mud Run begins Saturday, February 22, at Mud Muckers Park (2008 E. County Road 90, Bunnell). Visit xratedrun.com.

--Shelly Davidov




Sponsor Content