Bill Nelson Is In on the Python Hunt, Has Caught Zero Pythons So Far
ZOMG SENATOR THERE'S A PYTHON RIGHT THERE! KILL IT!
With the Great Python Purge Challenge Hunt Thing 2013 well under way, it seems all kinds of folks are joining in to try to win themselves some cash for killing a python.
One of those folks is apparently Sen. Bill Nelson himself.
And, like pretty much everyone else involved in the hunt, he's ending his days sansdead pythons.
That's not to say that no snakes have been killed.
But with a thousand people signed up to hunt down nearly 100,000 pythons invading the Everglades with their pythony pestilence, you'd think the killings would be in droves.
As in, mountains of dead pythons a day, or something.
The last official count has the kills at 21 so far.
Who would've thought that hunting an animal that thrives in humidity and is designed with the perfect camouflage within its own natural habitat such a challenge? IT'S A MYSTERY!
But that isn't stopping Senator Astronauts who, along with Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commissioner Ron Bergeron, joined in on the biggest exercise in futility seen in Florida since having a smooth and worry-free presidential election.
Nelson was the key man in championing the federal law banning the importation and interstate selling of the invasive python last year. And now he's totally down with the great python hunt that kicked off Saturday and ends February 10.
But, at approximately 3:47 Thursday afternoon, Nelson called off the search for the elusive snake that overpopulates the Everglades.
He did so on Twitter:
You can be sure Nelson will be back out in the swamps as soon as he can. After all, this is a guy who flew into outer space and once went to Syria without asking the president for permission.
You've been warned, pythons!
Get the This Week's Top Stories Newsletter
Every week we collect the latest news, music and arts stories — along with film and food reviews and the best things to do this week — so that you’ll never miss New Times Broward-Palm Beach's biggest stories.
- Rick Scott Declares State of Emergency as Tropical Storm Erika Approaches
Fri., Sep. 4, 11:30am
Fri., Sep. 4, 6:35pm
Sat., Sep. 5, 11:30am
Sat., Sep. 5, 7:00pm
- Kim and Kanye Pastor Rich Wilkerson Debuting Reality-TV Show
- Study: Fort Lauderdale Worst City in America for College-Educated Women to Date (Best...