Burt Reynolds' Auction: The Five Coolest Things You're Going to Want to Get Yourself This Holiday Season

Burt Reynolds in 1991
Burt Reynolds in 1991
photo by Alan Light via Wikimedia Commons

West Palm Beach native and former mega movie star Burt Reynolds recently announced he is auctioning off memorabilia from his own collection. And while it's natural to assume this is another case of a washed-up, cash-strapped star needing some dough, Reynolds insists he's not going broke.

The 600 or so items up for auction range from his high school football trophies to the 1977 Pontiac Trans Am he drove in the hit movie Smokey and the Bandit.

Reynolds, 78, who is also auctioning off his Golden Globe award for his performance in Boogie Nights, has been involved in a $1.2 million legal dispute with Bank of America following the foreclosure of his 12,500-square-foot mansion in Jupiter.

Still, Reynolds insists he's organized the purge merely because he's grown tired of seeing his own face all over his home.

"I've collected so many things that I truly adore but at this stage of my life I find it very difficult to manage them all," he writes in the auction catalog. "The fact of the matter is that it truly is the time to downsize... It's bittersweet for me to let those things go as I no longer have room for them as I go into the next adventure and chapter of my life."

And now, just in time for the holidays, Reynolds' stuff is up for grabs. But forget getting any of this stuff for your friends and relatives. This one is all about you. Treat yourself to a holiday gift you'll never forget, especially if you're all about impressing the ladies.

Here's a gander at some of the saddest most boss items you can get your hands on:

Burt Reynolds' Auction: The Five Coolest Things You're Going to Want to Get Yourself This Holiday Season

His Red Jacket From Smokey and the Bandit Can't afford the Trans Am? Why not spring for the jacket instead? The ladies will swoon when they see you rocking this thing around town in your 2007 Hyundai. And why wouldn't they? You look fast and rebellious. This is the jacket that left Smokey in his tracks and probably had some beer spilled on it by Jerry Reed. You can almost smell the late '70s just by looking at it. You can probably definitely smell it when you wear it. Also, check out the sweet "BANDIT" sleeve. That's what they're going to totally call you now. You're no longer Jeff from accounting. You're BANDIT.

Burt Reynolds' Auction: The Five Coolest Things You're Going to Want to Get Yourself This Holiday Season

Lithograph of Burt Wanting You to Have His Baby OK, so you got your lady friend back to your apartment. Now what? Give her some wine? Put on some music? Pffft. Walk her straight into the bedroom and show her the spectacle of this awesomeness hanging over your bed. That mustache. That track suit. That hairy chest. BOOM. You just scored a sweet lady, and all it cost you was $600 and a little bit of your dignity. WORRRTH ITTT. Hell, she probably got pregnant just by looking at this thing. Or, is that not what you want? Hey, man, don't blame the lithograph. You knew what you were getting into when you purchased it! You're messing with powers you don't understand!

 

Burt Reynolds' Auction: The Five Coolest Things You're Going to Want to Get Yourself This Holiday Season

His Boxing Robe Lost out on bidding for the jacket or the poster? No worries, friend. Bring the lady back to your pad and then ask to be excused. Go to your closet and come back to her wearing this and nothing else. At first she'll be repulsed and horrified, of course. Who does this creep think he is? This is is disgusting! Oh but wait. Slowly turn around to reveal the "Burt" embroidered on the back and how she's suddenly... intrigued. Still probably repulsed. But intrigued nonetheless.

Burt Reynolds' Auction: The Five Coolest Things You're Going to Want to Get Yourself This Holiday Season

This Mark McGwire Signed Photograph

So much steroids and plastic surgery in one photograph. Might be worth more than the $25 it's starting at, really.

Burt Reynolds' Auction: The Five Coolest Things You're Going to Want to Get Yourself This Holiday Season

Smokey and the Bandit Trans Am Replica Go-Cart

Chances are you don't have 80 grand lying around to buy the actual Trans Am from the movie. But no worries. Burt's got you covered. Because for just around $600, you can have this replica go-cart, which, when you think about it, is infinitely cooler because you can ride this pretty much anywhere you want, outside of a highway or a road. Plus, think of the money you'll save so you can also buy the red jacket. Now we're cooking! And think of how the ladies will react! Pull up to a pretty young thang in this sweet ride and you'll immediately be kind of a big deal. Offer them a ride, real smooth like. Then get out because she's going to have to drive it herself because there's only room for one.

The Burt Reynolds for the Property from the Life and Career of Burt Reynolds auction will go down in Las Vegas on December 11 and 12 at the Palms Casino Resort. Check out the site for more info. Good luck, champ!

Send your story tips to the author, Chris Joseph. Follow Chris Joseph on Twitter




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