Elton John Will Accept Money Only From One American Idol, Named Rush Limbaugh

In the same summer that Elton John accepted an invitation -- and $1 million -- to perform at the Palm Beach wedding of Rush Limbaugh, he is refusing to entertain far more generous offers to judge the performances of those aspiring to be the next American Idol.

The negotiations reportedly hit a snag due to John's schedule. God forbid he doesn't have time for important projects like turning Orwell's Animal Farm into a musical.

I suspect that the real reason he won't take the spot vacated by fellow Brit Simon Cowell is that Sir Elton is a snob.

Such an insufferable snob that he can't spend a few weeks listening to the inspired caterwauling of self-delusional Americans.

OK, it is a pretty rotten gig, no matter how much it pays. But if Elton's going to be a snob, he should at least be a consistent one. Besides being the wedding singer for Limbaugh's third bride, some more instances where John hasn't been too proud to say yes:

  • Disney asked John to make a song for The Lion King, a movie enjoyed by the same people who enjoy American Idol. He said yes.
  • David Beckham and Posh Spice asked John to be godfather to their two children. He said yes (only to banish them a few years later).
  • Caesars Palace asked John to perform for five years, from 2004 to 2009, alternating concerts with Celine Dion. He said yes and played 241 shows to a demographic that overlapped with American Idol viewers.

Tacky, tacky, and tacky. So face up to it, Elton. You're not too good for American Idol.

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