Facebook now includes "Civil Union" and "Domestic Partnership" among its relationship status options. Since the genesis of the online "Relationship Status" in the early 2000s, the few and definite choices have fallen short of defining the ever-complex myriad of situations that could constitute a "relationship."
Yes, "It's complicated" has been a reliable catchall for any point on the scale ranging from hookup to marriage, but in this age of oversharing, "complicated" grossly shortchanges how much information can be conveyed in a succinct status.
Suggestions after the jump.
Some people argue that "Civil Union" and "Domestic Partnership" fall
under the existing umbrella term "In a Relationship," while many say
that the terms' inclusion signifies a shift in our collective
consciousness to embrace all types of relationships. Others say it's a
nonproductive acknowledgment that same-sex couples cannot be married in
most states, including Florida.
Among all of these arguments, one thing
rings true: Certain people expressed a desire to more specifically define their
relationships on Facebook, and the powers that be granted that wish.
Whether it was a moral decision or a decision to direct more highly
targeted advertising, the "status" can of
worms is now wide open, begging the question: What other relationships lend
themselves to definitions independent of "It's complicated"?
Here are the top ten that come to mind. Feel free to comment your own additions.
10. Has an Oedipus Complex
9. Loves But Is Not in Love With...
8. Having an Affair
7. In a Bromance
6. Hooking Up
5. Is Mercilessly Leading On...
4. Cuddles but Won't Touch...
3. Isn't Over It/Is Creepily Facebook Stalking...
2. Plays Too Many Videogames but Isn't a Playa
1. Has an Acute Social Media Fetish
Follow The Juice on Twitter: @TheJuiceBPB.
