Florida Pulp Gets Slimed!
Okay, there's a saboteur in the house. He or she or they posted a bunch of "reviews" of my little book, Florida Pulp Nonfiction, on Amazon.com. Check it out here. It's clearly a slime job -- and what really hurts is that it's obvious they didn't even bother to read the book before the assault.
Each review was posted on July 27 and they each follow pretty much the same formula -- insult whatever they thought might be insultable in the book (with no supporting details) and then advocate other books. Yeah, they tout Ann Rule, James Patterson, Naked Came the Manatee, a children's book, and even Mind of Mencia. Oh and they also give a shout out to Miami Psychic, a book by a fake clairvoyant and Sun-Sentinel writer that I've recently debunked. (I think that's the best clue of all as to who is behind it).
But hey, who's pointing fingers? They also mistakenly refer to it as a novel, which it is not at all, take a weird shot at Jim DeFede, deride the fact that it's published by a self-publishing house, and label it a get-rich-quick scheme. While that is all laughable, I want to say the book was a gift to me from the National Society of Newspaper Columnists.
I haven't even put the book in stores yet. I just don't have the time (anybody know a decent book publicist, by the way?). In fact, I haven't marketed it at all other than a mention on this here blog. There are two reviews on the Amazon page that are from people who used their actual names. Read those to get an idea of what this book is really like. Or check out this site.
The slimer(s) had some passion, I'll give them that. Check out this line: "As I read each story and realized how much Bob Norman "contributes to the abuse of power and illegal/unethical behavior" by so-called "investigative" reporters from two-bit tabloids riddled with porn ads, hiding behind the FIRST AMENDMENT, I laugh."
Or: "Exploiting to line his own pockets in my opinion! It seems it is nothing more than cheap paparazzi transformed into want-a-be novelist. Shame on this guy. I bought the book thinking it was going to be interesting, it is nothing more than a bore and a get rich quick plan for the author at the expense of others is what I believe."
And my favorite: "Better luck re-writing a recipe from your Mimaw's Derby Pie, Kentucky Bob, than piecing some semblance of a novel together from archives, it seems. At least Mimaw added some Bourbon-y kick to spice it up. I'd have to drink an entire bottle of Mimaw's nerve tonic to get through the slow-as-molasses I dun-dunnit."
Good show. Work it out. More power.
But one thing really does piss me off: The scalawags clearly lied about the part where they said they bought the book.
Get the This Week's Top Stories Newsletter
Every week we collect the latest news, music and arts stories — along with film and food reviews and the best things to do this week — so that you'll never miss New Times Broward-Palm Beach's biggest stories.