Big Love for our hometown this week. Not only did Sherman's Travel name Fort Liquordale one of the top 10 most underrated cities in the nation last week, second only to, well, to Baltimumble, but Carmen Electra has announced to the world that she was just simply taken aback by how much fun she had rubbing her fiance with suntan oil all over our beaches. According to Sherman, visitors to FL might spend the day this way:
If you like this story, consider signing up for our email newsletters.
SHOW ME HOW
You have successfully signed up for your selected newsletter(s) - please keep an eye on your mailbox, we're movin' in!
"Stroll the stunning seaside promenade and comb a strand of sand that rivals Miami Beach, then set out for some irresistible shopping, and finally cap off your day with a culinary feast at one of the city's stellar international restaurants. Combined with a surprisingly sophisticated arts and museum scene, an extensive yachting and golfing network, and one of America's top gay and lesbian scenes, Fort Lauderdale's status as Florida's fashionable destination du jour is long overdue."
As for Electra, she told USA Today that she loved our beautiful scenery and our beautiful bodies (and we love yours too, Carm!). "It was really relaxing," she said.
Still, unnamed sources told New Times that when the people in charge found out Sherman and Electra were coming, they deliberately hid from view:
1) anyone claiming to be the Devil
2) anyone holding a sign depicting Obama as Adolph Hitler
3) any teenager harboring concealed diagrams of feline anatomy
4) all thermometers depicting temperatures of 110 degrees or higher
5) pythons measuring longer than 15 feet
6) Cher impersonators
7) the Jungle Queen