Having three first names would seem to be enough. Wrong. At least if you are Lee Ervin Dale, 30, of Fort Lauderdale, who has been charged with 14 counts of identity theft in his efforts to get other people's tax refunds.
Look. We know the thing about Florida is that you can pretend to be whoever you want. But this is going too far,
The charge comes just weeks after the sentencing of a local couple that was posing as victims of the Gulf oil spill so they could get compensation checks. By now the U.S. attorney must be in his office, crying softly into his tea, wondering why the hell people can't just be themselves.
So, what did Dale get for his efforts?
Over $8,000 a pop for "J.B." and "B.A.J." in January 2008. Then $6,700 for "K.S.C." Then eight more checks for $8,421. He also stole three social security numbers, because what the hell?
But Dale was just following suit: It turns out that our beloved Miami-Fort Lauderdale metro area was ranked first in the nation for identity theft:
Contrary to what you might think, credit card fraud does not represent the chief type of identity theft in Florida, according to the report. Rather, in both 2009 and 2010, the leading type of identity theft in Florida involved "government documents or benefits fraud."
Florida: where nobody gets proper government benefits except the people who are scamming the whole system. When we think outside the box and innovate, it's to come up with schemes like this, not to start small businesses or cure disease or anything.
Dale could face up to 17 years in prison plus a whole lotta fines.
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