Happy Canada Day, Leslie Nielsen! (I'm NOT Stalking You)

This originally appeared on New Times letterhead, addressed to his local residence:

August 14, 2008

Dear Mr. Nielsen,

I'm a reporter with New Times, the local weekly newspaper. I've been a fan of yours for some time now and I've wanted to write to you for a while.

I know this might sound weird (and random), but here goes: will you be my friend?

If you'd be willing, I'd love to write a story about hanging out with Leslie Nielsen. We can do anything you feel like, anywhere, any time. If, for example, you feel like eating pizza, I'd love to take you for pizza. Ditto for miniature golf, the movies, or anything you'd like, really.

Now to clarify, I am not insane. I am a professional journalist (believe it or not, I wrote for The Dallas Morning News before moving to Florida). Most of my stories are about sports or crime, but I'd love to write something light-hearted and fun. And you've always been one of my favorite actors.

The story can be about anything you want, limited only by our collective imagination. If this is something you might not hate, any response would be fantastic.

And I apologize if the oddness of this request has offended you in any way.

Michael J. Mooney

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