Lauderdale Votes for Non-Obama Candidates, Democracy Ignored in Non-Twitter Format
Voters in Fort Lauderdale will elect a mayor and an entire city council today, while over in Fort Myers, President Obama is speaking. Approximately four dozen or so Fort Lauderdale residents
are expected to turn temporarily away from their Twitter accounts to vote, and, oh, over on the west coast, thousands waited in line just to get a ticket to hear the King of Hope speak. On the line in Fort Lauderdale are some important city issues and such, while, oh yeah, OBAMA!
It may be clear by now, but I'm not exactly up on the issues at stake in Fort Lauderdale. But I do know Jay Leno-style facts about some of the candidates, like that one of them says he's in the Army but is actually a slacker -- i.e., retired. Another really likes the porn. And another sounds like he hangs out with Snow White. But I do know that if you love democracy then you should get out there and -- OBAMA!
After the jump, more signs that democracy is super cool, kids!
Tamarac Twits, Kids Rejoyce in Being Second-to-Last
The city of Tamarac has started its own Twitter account. And while you might be thinking that Tamarac's Twitter page is clearly the least-cool Twitter page ever, let's not forget that a Twitter page has also been set up by the city of Boynton Beach. So see, kids of Tamarac, your town isn't super lame, just mostly lame.
Cuba Travel Story Goes Ignored in Paragraph Form
Congress is considering lifting the travel ban to Cuba, and while this might be good news for those who want to travel to the communist nation, it's really going to be missed by most of us unless this news can be converted into Twitter format. Either that or written on a pro-Obama sign.
Get the This Week's Top Stories Newsletter
Every week we collect the latest news, music and arts stories — along with film and food reviews and the best things to do this week — so that you’ll never miss New Times Broward-Palm Beach's biggest stories.
- Boca Body Art Tattoo Parlor Owner Accused of Sexual Assault
Thu., Oct. 15, 7:00pm
Thu., Oct. 15, 7:30pm
Sat., Oct. 17, 12:00am
Sat., Oct. 17, 10:00am
- Fort Lauderdale Developer to Build 380-Unit, "Multifamily Project" Near New River
- John Morgan to Match Medical Marijuana Donations 9 to 1 For 2016 Ballot