Down 0-1? Lance Stephenson hitting ridiculous shots? The Pacers offense suddenly looking like the Showtime Lakers? Pffft. No problem. Not when you've got a perfectly good Dwyane Wade and LeBron James whom you can unleash on your enemies.
The dynamic duo once again blew up shit with their awesomeness, combining for 22 points in the fourth quarter to lead the Heat to an 87-84 Game 2 win, while guys like Norris Cole and Chris Andersen decided to pay tribute to our Udonis Haslem article from yesterday by cockpunching the Indiana Pacers (figuratively) and evening things up in the Eastern Conference Finals.
For the most part, Game 2 was being a total asshole with its obnoxiousness. LeBron was playing weirdly inconsistently, while Chris Bosh continued to play like an old man pees. Wade was the only player approaching things like being down 0-2 in the ECF would be one gargantuan monkey fist up our collective asses.
After going into the half up by four and a third quarter that can be described only as buckets of dicks, LeBron and Wade came out in the last 12 minutes of the game and decided to take over by combining to outscore the entire city of Indiana and Larry Bird's sad Cartoon Turtle face by hitting a collective 9-for-12 in crunch time.
With 4:19 remaining and the game and series in serious doubt and LeBron playing basketball like a truck stuck in a snowbank, we all knew it was time.
LeBron was able to draw a foul that tied things up, which catapulted LeBron and Wade on a 10-0 run that steamrolled Indiana so bad their fans ran away literally.
The duo outscored the entire Indiana Pacers franchise 22-20 in the fourth quarter, because apparently they didn't get the memo that reads, "LeBron James and Dwyane Wade will never work together because they both demand the ball too much." Or that other memo that says, "LeBron is not clutch at crunch time." Or that other memo that says, "D-Wade is finished." Or maybe they did get those memos but then tossed them into the Do Not Give a Single Solitary Fuck pile, along with hate mail from Bill Simmons, envelopes that say they've won the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes, and Jehovah's Witness pamphlets.
All they did was combine on the Heat's final 33 points.
The Heat was able to overcome Lance Stephenson's insufferableness and his stupid 25 points. It was also able to overcome Bosh's never-ending and losing battle with WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU? While he did hit a key three-pointer late in the game, he was still pretty atrocious, scoring just nine points and heaving up awful shots that just aren't connecting.
But LeBron and Wade were human wrecking balls of justice and evened the series out as they ripped home court advantage away from the Pacers as the series heads to Miami.
LeBron dropped 22 points and snatched seven rebounds overall while dishing out six assists. Wade joined in the maelstrom of Pacer cock-drop-kicking and contributed 23 points of his own on a lights-out 10-for-16 shooting.
The result was a monumental ass-beating at the hands of two of the best players in the NBA.
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