Lessons From Mitt Romney: Here's How to Strap Fido to the Roof of Your Car
Click on the photo for how-to instructions on Romneying your dog.
Mitt Romney sure can't catch a break on this Seamus the Dog controversy. He puts his Irish setter on the roof of his car one time -- one time! -- and people just can't seem to stop thinking that makes him a bad person.
If you haven't heard, Romney has admitted to putting Seamus in a dog carrier on top of
his car and then driving 12 hours across Canada. When Seamus' diarrhea
rolled down the back of the car, Romney calmly stopped at a gas station,
borrowed a garden hose, and gave both the dog and the car a good
cleaning. At the end of the trip, Seamus the dog had developed a
propensity to wander off, so Romney gave him away.
There are probably a few people who hear this story of Seamus and wonder if it's not actually a brilliant idea. Maybe you have a family vacation planned across the coldest part of North America. Perhaps you have a dog that you'd rather strap to the roof. Let's say, for the sake of argument, that you too have no moral qualms about animal cruelty.
Well then, this how-to guide is just the thing for you. Follow this link for our helpful instructions on how to Romney your dog. That's a verb now, Romney. It means to strap a household pet onto the roof of your family's vehicle and drive a long distance. It's a pretty good question to ask dates or job candidates. "Have you ever Romneyed?" "Oh, God no," they'll say. "I want to get into politics someday."
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