Miami Heat 2013 Wrecking Tour Part II Starts Sunday
Here we go, Heat fans.
Now that the regular season is over, and the Miami Heat competed a team-best 66-win season, and all the media-myth created nonsense about LeBron James being a choker is over and done with, and all the media-myth created nonsense about Heat fans being the worst fanbase in the NBA is over and done with, it's time to strap in, buckle down and get cray, because the NBA Playoffs kick off this weekend.
First up for the Heat is a first-round matchup with the number 8 seeded Milwaukee Bucks.
The crazy kicks off on Sunday, when Miami hosts the Bucks at the American Airlines Arena. Tip-off will be at 7:00 pm, which leaves us all ample time to get properly sloshed before the game, as well as gives us time to catch Mad Men afterwards.
Game 2 will also be in Miami, on Tuesday at 7:30 pm.
Game 1 be aired on TNT, but we'd rather shove a Volkswagen up our ass watching the Heat on that network of morons, so we have the option of also watching the game on Sun Sports.
Game 2 will be aired on NBA TV, which is at least better than TNT because it doesn't have Reggie Miller saying dumb shit on the broadcast. But Sun Sports will also air Game 2, so it's a moot point.
Game 3 will head to Milwaukee for a 7:00 pm tip-off. That game will also be aired on TNT, but Sun Sports too, so it's cool. Also, the NFL Draft takes place later that night, so there should be a lot of channel switching and a lot of changes in emotion (HAPPINESS. RAGE. HAPPINESS. RAGE). Fun!
Game 4, also in Milwaukee, will be played at 3:30 pm on Sunday and aired on ABC where we'll definitely have to hear Reggie Miller say dumb shit like, "How do you leave Mario Chalmers wide open for a contested three?"
Games 5, 6 & 7 would alternate, if necessary*
*They probably won't be necessary.
Even though we just broke down the first round schedule for you, here it is in bracket form:
Heat-Bucks First Round Hoedown:
Game 1 - Sunday in Miami, 7 p.m. (TNT, Sun Sports)
Game 2 - Tuesday in Miami, 7:30 p.m. (NBA TV, Sun Sports)
Game 3 - Thursday, April 25 in Milwaukee, 7 p.m., (TNT, Sun Sports)
Game 4 - Sunday, April 28, in Milwaukee, 3:30 p.m. (ABC)
# Game 5 - Tuesday, April 30 in Miami, time TBA (Sun Sports, national network TBA)
# Game 6 - Thursday, May 2 in Milwaukee, time TBA (Sun Sports, national network TBA)
# Game 7 - Saturday, May 4 in Miami (time and TV TBA)
#: If necessary
Get the Weekly Newsletter
Our weekly feature stories, movie reviews, calendar picks and more - minus the newsprint and sent directly to your inbox.