With November 6 a mere four weeks away, Florida decided it's about time to do that thing where it screws up the election.
LET'S DO THIS, FLORIDA!
According to Elections Supervisor Susan Bucher, about 60,000 Palm Beach County absentee ballots that have already been mailed by the Palm Beach County Supervisor of Elections Office got screwed up thanks to a printing error.
That's the last time Simmons puts his butt cheeks on the printer during an office party!
Bucher says the printing company that handled the ballots had a computer problem, where about half of the 60,000 ballots left some information off portions of the ballots. The problem is that Bucher's office mailed the ballots out before noticing the error.
So now, election workers are going to have to sort through each ballot that gets mailed back by voters and duplicate the screwed-up ones so they can run through the machines that tally the votes and OH MY GAWD IT'S THE YEAR 2000 ALL OVER AGAIN.
Actually, the problem is with certain judicial races -- not the big-ticket item for president. But still, it's a big screw-up, a big pain in the ass, and another punch to the face for Palm Beach County election peeps.
Some titles intended to separate the categories of each judicial candidate are not on the effected ballots, specifically in the races for retention of Florida Supreme Court justices and for the Fourth District Court of Appeal.
But Bucher and her staff are taking the gaffe seriously, while blaming it on the printing company.
For their part, the printing company, Runbeck Printing, are going all "MY BAD" and taking responsibility for the messed-up ballots.
There's still time for absentee voters to request new ballots, and Bucher says that public observers will be on hand to oversee elections employees who work on the marred ballots before shoving them into the vote-counting machines.
The story here, of course, is that Palm Beach County is once again in the spotlight for screwing up voting ballots. Those who were around during the 2000 presidential election between George W. Bush and Al Gore remember the infamous "hanging chad" episode.
That happened in Palm Beach!
In 2010, the governor's race between Rick Scott and Alex Sink was delayed due to slow vote counting.
That happened in Palm Beach!
"This is serious stuff," said Palm Beach County Republican Party Chairman Sid Dinerstein.
He then tried to lighten the mood with a little joke.
"It's important that if you are going to screw ballots up, you do it in this county," he said. "We have reputation to uphold."
HA. HA. HA. It's funny because Florida ruins everything.
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